March Out Of Winter & Into Spring
By: Laura-Lee Smith

Many of us were beyond over winter and more than ready for spring after the blizzard of '09 ended and two months later snowmageddon 2010 hit the east coast.  Fortunately, we only have a few more weeks to soldier through blistering cold weather and unflattering winter coats before we can break out the flip-flops and spring cardigans.  Unfortunately we aren't there yet; we may already be carrying the extra spoils of winter on our bodies, and we may feel as though we've awoken from a long uncomfortable nap.  We not only have to deal with inclement weather and unflattering gear, but dry skin, a loss of Vitamin D from shorter days, the desire to stay indoors and hibernate, and a few extra pounds.  Many of us just commit ourselves to being miserable because, lets face it, that's what winter is, but here are a few helpful tips to not only combat the last few weeks of winter, but prime ourselves for an active and happy spring.

Winter Tip #1 Play the party planner.  Give some of your closest girlfriends a call, urge them to get a babysitter and have a dinner party.  Cook some hearty cold weather dishes; maybe try out a few new recipes on your friends.  Or try getting dressed up, ditch the boyfriends or husbands, find a local watering hole or your favorite restaurant, and have a night out with the girls.

Winter Tip #2 Remember to pamper your self in preparation for spring.  There will be winter days when going outside is so not going to happen.  Instead, stock up on masks, lotions, exfoliators, bath salts or bubbles, and have a spa day at home.  Skin can become especially problematic in the winter and keeping on top of a skin regiment, most importantly exfoliating and a nice, thick moisturizer is extra important.  Grab your favorite book, your most unsexy flannel pajamas, slather some avocado paste on your face, and curl up.  Not only will you relax, but you'll be prepping your skin for those cute spring dresses we're all dreaming about.
   
Winter Tip #3 Take yourself out on a date.  Find your favorite restaurant, plop yourself down at the bar, have a glass of red and some alone time.  A good meal and a little self-indulgence goes a long way to battle the winter weather.  Also, it's always a boost of self-confidence sitting by yourself with only your thoughts as company without any armor.

Winter Tip #4 Make a list of all the fun activities you want to do when the temperature goes up.  It will not only motivate you to get yourself ready for whatever is on your list, maybe a beach trip or a marathon, but it will also get you revved up and excited for spring.  After the beating we got on the east coast, we need something to look forward to.

Winter Tip #5 Get moving. You might ask yourself what the point of forcing yourself out of the warm confines of your home is.  Staying indoors may make you feel disconnected from the world as well as set you in a pattern that might be difficult to break on that first beautiful day.  The best way to combat it is to meet the world head on, cold or not.
 
It's hard to leave the house when the wind is howling outside and you can feel the cold down to your bones, but with a big sigh we get out of bed every morning, put clothes on and head out to work.  So why not battle the winter weather for something a little more fun?  It's been a long winter and many of us still have piles of snow on the ground to prove it, but making the effort to live when most mammals are hibernating will help you march out of winter and happily into spring.

First published March 2010




Fall In Love With You
By: Ansa Edim

We often times have significant others whom we depend on as an affirmation of our beauty, our intelligence, and at times even our usefulness. If that person leaves, even temporarily, we may feel lost and unable to find confidence in ourselves until someone else comes along to reaffirm us. Yes, other people are very important to your self-esteem, and a person's self-esteem and confidence can be gained through other peoples' praise. Through negative or positive feedback, you can excel or falter in life. However, relying solely on one person to build your self-esteem is unhealthy and can be dangerous. If you depend on one person for validation, that person can help you build your confidence and also help destroy it. If someone can bring you love, they can also take it away. Whether they're helping or hindering your self-esteem, constant dependency from anyone other than yourself is unnecessary; for you alone can build your self-esteem. Remember, you are in control of you. Your self-esteem should be based on how you feel about yourself, not what others think of you. Confidence comes from within. Beauty comes from within. Self-esteem comes from within. Love comes from within. Escape the need to depend on validation from others. Learn how to strengthen yourself from within.

Confidence
Think of ways to build your confidence. Take a public speaking class or dance class. Take up a sport. Make a list of things you want to do. Do something outside of your regular activity. Be wild and bold. Step outside of your shell. Do things that will take you out of your comfort zone. Do something that you never thought you could do before. Instill confidence within yourself. Don't borrow it from your significant other.

Beauty
Get a makeover with the girls! Take time out to treat yourself. Go to a local makeup counter with your girlfriends and get your make up, hair, and nails done. Go to the spa! Also remember that beauty is on the inside. Your skills, talents, personality and traits among many other components are what make you beautiful. They make you YOU. You may not be able to control outer beauty, however inner beauty is completely in your hands.

Self-esteem
How can you build your self-esteem? First, find out why you have low self-esteem. Low self-esteem leads to thoughts of "I don't deserve that", "everything is too good for me", or "I'm not worthy". Take steps to build your self-esteem. When you look to someone else for self-esteem, they are in control of how you feel about yourself. If you already have high self-esteem, negative influences will bounce right off of you. When someone tries to belittle you, it's not going to work. Think to yourself, "I don't need that person to validate me." Self-esteem is important because it encompasses self-confidence, beauty, and love.

Love
You have to love yourself before you can love anyone else or before anyone can love you. If you don't, their love will go away one day and you will be left empty without it. If you're left with no love, what are you going to do? You're going to keep looking for the rest of your life without true satisfaction. You will never be complete until you find yourself - until you're able to say to yourself "I love you." You have to find true love inside yourself. No matter who comes and goes in your life, you will always be the constant. Although relationships without self-love sometimes make it, nevertheless in order to feel complete love you have to love yourself first. Once you are able to tell what real love is, you will be able to determine when someone else's affections for you are real or fake.

Confidence, beauty, self-esteem and love are four important parts of your well-being. These fundamental elements are going to assist you in building true love within. Without a firm grip, if your love leaves, you are back again at square one. You want to be able to find true love through your own self. Once you can find true love, you can give it. Learn to be happy by yourself. You need to learn to be stable without having someone to lean on. You cannot create happiness through someone else. You have to create it within yourself and promote it through yourself.

First published February 2010




Loving Yourself Today
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We sometimes depend so much on how others see us or what others say about us, in order to determine who we are or interpret the way we feel about ourselves. Deciding to listen to what others are saying in order to define yourself can be exhausting, destructive to your self-esteem and confidence, and results in a negative outcome. Finding who you are should solely depend on you rather then what others may say or think.

Tell people who you are by being just as you are. Loving yourself today starts with you telling the world, "This is me. Take me as I am!".

Appreciate Yourself
Appreciate yourself completely. This includes appreciating your trails and errors. Love yourself just as you are. You have a divine role as a woman. You are a beautiful strong woman. You have been blessed with many talents and gifts. You are a unique individual with so much to give. Love the woman you are today. Be confident in yourself and find ways to express yourself and share you gifts.

Laugh At Yourself
When you think back to something that you did that was embarrassing do you tend to punish yourself? Remember that we all make embarrassing mistakes. We all fall hard at times. It's fine to laugh at yourself. Learning is wonderful and embracing your life completely is amazing. Laughing is a great way to let go of issues and problems. It can also be a healing process. Don't take yourself so seriously. Make time to laugh at your struggles and the things that you have grown from. Enjoy yourself, including the clumsy you.

Comfort Yourself
When your struggling or going through hard times you can learn to encourage yourself of a better tomorrow. Learn to embrace yourself and find power within. Letting others comfort you can work wonders, however, giving yourself a reassurance that things will work out can really strengthen your self-esteem and give you power and strength.

Do It Yourself
Don't expect others to do things for you. Be in charge and in control of what happens around you. Take initiative. Take control. Learn to do thing on your own and be empowered by having the skills to get thing accomplished. Be assertive. Take charge of today and live your better tomorrow.

Back Pat Yourself
When you accomplish or achieve something that you have worked hard for give yourself a big pat on the back. You are a hard worker and you deserve to enjoy success. Go out with a close friend and celebrate your achievements.

Stand for Yourself
When someone is right about something learn to take correction and build yourself. We are all learning each day. Learn to better yourself. However, always stand for yourself in dignity. Be firm in who you are and what makes you a strong woman. Don't let others push your around. Stand for what you believe in and what you believe to be right. Don't let anyone else other then yourself determine who you are, who you should be or what you do. You are the only one that can make yourself happy and can keep yourself happy. Choose what you want in your life. No matter what you choose make choices that will lead you to a better future and a better you. Don't settle for less.




Trials of Happiness
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Happiness is not always so easy to grasp especially when unhappy times present themselves. However, without knowing what it feels like to have times of sadness, we wouldn't be able to appreciate happiness and embrace life completely. Looking for the good in everything is key to making any obstacle easy whether the moment presents us with a happy or sad face.

Controlling Thoughts/Thinking Happy
You can control how you feel about what happens around you. No matter what you may be going through it is crucial to stay focus on positive and happy thoughts. Be optimistic, think of better times, and focus on your blessings and achievements.

Addressing Situations
When you start to dwell on unhappy circumstances you become consumed by the pain, anger or sadness. These feelings can drain you and make you feel unable to assume a happy and joyful life. In turn, you may keep yourself in this state determining that you have no joy that awaits. This frame of mind can hamper your development and keep you from overcoming feelings of sadness. However, addressing the situation immediately and dealing with your feelings will help you move forward.

Reverse Unhappy Thoughts
When you begin to think unhappy thoughts the best step to take is to reverse the thought. For instance, if you are going to speak to a group of people, you might feel nervous or even frightened. Reverse your thoughts of not doing well by using words of affirmation and control your nerves by practicing calming exercises before you approach the podium.

A Bright Future
Although the present may not seem so blissful it doesn't mean the future will not be. As with any obstacle, they come and go and you gain knowledge and experience. You also become strengthened and gain determination to overcome any obstacle. Think of it this way, the best is yet to come. No matter what you are going through look forward to a bright future.

Overcoming
We all go through obstacles but with determination we overcome. Regardless of what burdens, troubles or worries you face you will have the strength to overcome it. Remember that in addition to the steps to happiness and other tools, finding good friends, family members and professionals can also assist you in overcoming any obstacle. As you grow, sharing your story with others will give you an opportunity to help others be strengthened in their adversities and build their confidence.




Finding Strength In Others
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Have you ever heard that whatever you do comes back to you? Or that positive attracts positive? Whether you believe this or not, doing good deeds and encouraging others to succeed can bring you happiness. By learning to implement the strategies that are listed below, you will be able to learn to rejoice in others' accomplishments, assist others in growth and success, embrace others' talents, and compliment others and wish them well. With the proper attitude and mind-set, you can enrich your life by finding strength through other people's joys. You will also notice a ripple effect as you start to live with a positive view of those that surround you.


Embrace Others
Do you compare yourself to others?
Sometimes admiring others' gifts, talents, beauty and accomplishments can make you feel inadequate. When doing so, you begin to wish and envy, taking for granted your own blessings and gifts. You may begin to feel resentment and anger towards others which may result in a negative mind-set. Also, by comparing yourself, you eventually eliminate what you have. Your own talents may even begin to diminish. As individuals, as sisters and as women, we need to learn to embrace our differences and feel united with one another. We all have our talents and gifts, our own unique beauty and qualities. Each one of us is different. So, instead of trying to compare yourself to others, complement others and be proud of others. Find joy in others' gifts, talents. Find admiration in others' beauty and accomplishments.


Find Joy In Others
When someone has good news how does it make you feel?
Try to avoid negative feelings or jealousy for others. Feeling jealous can be unhealthy. Wishing bad to others is damaging. Even if someone offended you, only you can control your emotions. If ever you begin to feel a sense of anger and jealousy, stop yourself. Decide immediately that you will simply try to have a positive attitude towards them. Stay away from gossiping or slandering their name. Just as you wouldn't want someone else to think negatively about you, it is important that we care for others and wish them well.

Be Happy for Others
Do you desire for others to succeed?
Some people are inclined not to help their fellow (wo)men and would rather see them fail in their endeavors. This type of thinking is very selfish. When someone achieves a goal or something good happens to them, you should be happy for them. Finding joy in others' happiness and success is away to obtain happiness for yourself. It's like having a ray of sunshine. When others progress, rejoice in their progression as if it were your own. Not only will you be filled with joy in your heart, it will also influence you and encourage you to strive for your own goals. The sunshine spreads and gives you the motivation and inspiration to succeed. As you care for others and wish them well you will have compassion for them. You will feel their pain when they struggle and you will be in a joyous mood when they succeed.

Assist Others
Are you helpful in assisting others become better?
Never underestimate the act of service. You have a lot to share and give. There are many who seek to be enriched by you through your talents and skills. No matter your talent you can be a teacher and aid in the development of others. Find ways to assist others and build them so they can reach for their goals and dreams. As you assist others in becoming their best, you will find that you will grow as well.




Letting Go of Bad Situations
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What if on your way to work you fell right on your face and was embarrassed by the audience you attracted. Things happen. We all go through times when we wish we could turn the clock backwards. However, we can't. The best thing to do is to learn to deal with situations.

Gain Courage
When a bad situation happens don't turn away from it and ignore it. Instead, fully understand what happened and move forward. Don't dwell on it. This will only leave you replaying the situation in your head which can be very destructive. Gain the courage to face it fully. If the situation is one that needs a solution, resolve the problem and move on with your life.

De-stress
Many people tend to stress over the smallest situations. However, learning to take it one step at at time will help you calm your nerves. Remember that the more stressed you become the worst the situation will be. So just loosen up. Find appropriate ways to let go of the stress.

Talk It through
Find a friend that is willing to listen. Talking it through will help you overcome the struggle and help you to fix the situation the right way. Many times we are so bubbled with emotions that we don't think properly. Your friend might have a different look at the situation that you may not have considered.

Time-Out
Don't react to situations out of anger or frustration. It is natural to want to immediately react to the situations that occur on a daily bases. However, remember that some situation call for a time-out. Know when you need to think things through, consult with a friend or simply calm your nerves before you react.

Relax
It is always good to remember that no one was born perfect. We are bound to make mistakes. The way we recover from our mistakes is what is most important. If you stick to the situation the situation will stick to you. Be ready to address it and move forward. Bounce back into action by just remembering that to err is human. It is okay to make mistakes. It is more important to learn from our mistakes so we don't repeat them again.




Hello?! How Do I Say Not Now?
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It's been a long day and you just want to relax, unwind or maybe even sleep. The house is quiet and you just finished all your chores. All of a sudden you get a call. The ringing is so loud that you want to just unplug the phone but you instead decide to pick it up. It's your friend. The one that loves to talk. A lot. What do you do?

Treating others the way we would want to be treated is a great way to resolve a chatty friend situation. Everyone tends to be chatty about what they consider to be important, which means even we may be as gabby as our most loquacious friend(s). So note to self: a talkative friend may indeed represent you. Also, it may be difficult to speak up to a chatter because you don't want to be offensive or worst ruin a friendship. However, it is necessary that you speak up for yourself. So, how can you address a chatty friend without being to direct?

Be Nice
Even if you may not be ready to talk to a friend on the phone it is very important that you treat that person with respect and courtesy. Many times, when we want to talk people may not want to listen. However, if we get a rude reply from them, we may not want to talk to them again. Sometimes people may even back away from opening up to anyone else because of their past experience (with a close friend). Being impolite and rude may even result in you observing your close friends not being interested in confiding in you because you may have pushed them away in many occasions. So remember to be nice in the way you approach those who might admire you, those who want a close relationship with you, and those that you care about. This does not mean that you should let them lead the conversation or surrender to them, but tell them in a pleasant way that you are sleepy, busy, tired (whatever is taking your concentration at the time). Whatever you say, express yourself with caution. Be careful not to offend.

Be the Listener
Knowing how to listen to people takes time. One thing that we don't do enough of is listening. We want to be heard but we are usually not ready to listen. Have patience, pay attention and listen closely to what your friend does say (within the time of you picking up the phone to the time you decide to end the conversation). Hey, when it's your turn to be the chatterbox you would want the same reassurance. The reassurance that your friend is interested in your life and is really listening. Even if you find yourself in a situation where your friend continues to ramble, it would be wise to be the listener; end the conversation in a sophisticated way that says your listening. You can do this by making comments towards the topic she/he is tackling in closing the conversation but still sticking to what you want. For example: "I can't believe that happened to you today. I really want to hear more. Give me an hour and I'll call you back." This way they feel that you are interested, concern and willing to listen to them. At the same time you are in control of the present conversation and any other conversation in the future (you will be the one to return their call and make sure you do).
 
Be True
Don't lie to avoid talking to a friend. You just might get caught and lose their trust. You wouldn't be building your confidence by not being true to what you feel. Simply speak your mind without making them feel as if they are not significant in your life. Also be true to yourself and what you are looking to achieve. Don't let them get the best of you and bully you into spending hours with them when there are important obligations and tasks awaiting you. Most friends will understand and be glad to give you time and space.

Be Assertive
Who is going to speak for you? No one but you. Only you know how you feel. Sometimes, after trying the above mentioned tactful suggestions you may find that you are still not getting anywhere with being polite and having patience. Some friends can be pushovers and will not budge no matter how benignant you may be. If you find yourself in a situation where you are not being heard, your feelings, likes and dislikes tend to be rejected or doesn't seem to matter to the person whom you are conversing with, you may have to be less discreet. No matter how bad the situation may be, speaking your mind tastefully and with a warm loving voice will keep you in control.

Tip: All of the suggested ways to approach a chatty friend can be useful not only for phone conversations but also in person.




Tell Mr. Right What You Want
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Finding Mr. Right, as we know is not a simple task. It takes time, lots of it for some and not much for others. However, if you are in the process of finding Mr. Right or Mr. Right is already your husband or your significant other, getting Mr. Right to understand you can take time also. However, it is vital that you and Mr. Right learn to understand each other. As you do so, you will be able to find growth in yourself, feel secure in your relationship and be able to communicate your desires, aspirations and dreams.

A brief note on Mr. Right: Of course the obvious applies when you meet your Mr. Right. Mr. Right should be someone that respects you, which includes loving you for you. No exceptions! He will be there for you during hard times, through sickness and health (literary). Someone whom you find attractive, you can communicate with, has similar interest, etc.  All these elements assists you in knowing if the potential candidate (if you're still looking and of course if you've found him) is Mr Right or Mr No-Way!

Don't  Change Yourself
Looking for Mr. Right: Imagine having to pretend to be someone else for a guy. Pretending eventually gets old and will not give you happiness. Be yourself. Being who you are will make you very happy. It always does. Do not change who you are for Mr Right. Because if Mr Right is Mr. Right you won't have to change who you are. So, look for someone who loves you for YOU and that you can be yourself around. Who wants to be with someone that doesn't know who they really are and appreciate them for being them.

Found Mr. Right: Continue to be yourself. He married you for you. His love and respect for you has grown deeper. He should be wooing you just as he did when you were dating. Of course, it will not be exactly the same, since you are now settled. The wooing will not be as elaborate as before. However, you both are responsible to keep the romance alive. Which means sometimes you will have to remind him, "Hello, remember me? The one you wooed." For those of you who have the Mr Right that continues to give you flowers on a weekly bases, good for you! Keep up the good job (or tell him to keep up the good job). However, if you have to remind Mr. Right to bring back the romance. Then please, by all means, do it.

Stick To Your Desires, Goals, & Dreams
Looking for Mr Right: Your dreams and goals are apart of what makes you who you are. You want someone that believes in you and is willing to help you in fulfilling your dreams. As you help him with his goals he should equally assist you with accomplishing yours. So be honest about what you want out of life. Be direct. This way there is no miscommunication. Do you want kids? When? Does he? Where do you want to live? Do you want a career? These and many others questions. Know where you stand with these questions. 

Found Mr. Right: As you and Mr Right being to grow and continue to grow it is vital that you remain faithful to the things that you want in life. Stick to the goals and dreams that you have set for yourself. Your goals and dreams were very important to you before you meet Mr. Right and should continue to be. At times your goals might change with each phase of life. An example of this would be rearing children. Your goals may slightly change because it's a new stage that changes you and you have a different view of yourself and your wants. You may put your goals on hold for a while if desired but that doesn't mean that you should eliminate your goals and dreams. It will also give you a sense of self-assurance and accomplishment to continue to follow what you have set for yourself.

Allowing Change
Looking for Mr. Right: Mr right is not going to be perfect but no one is perfect. You and Mr. Right will not have every single thing in common. He will have his own hobbies and feel different about many issues. However, Mr right should have qualities that you admire. You should feel like you can grow with him. Feeling like he can educate you and help you to become a better person. Mr Right can even open your eyes to new concepts and ideas. For an example, say Mr Right loves skiing and you have never gone skiing before or he loves camping and you can't imagine a day of natural outdoorsy stuff. Well, here is your chance to learn something new, allowing change and growth in your life. You both are growing and will be able to teach each other a lot, be open-minded. However, make sure you are striving for positive growth only and never do anything you may not be comfortable doing. 

Found Mr Right: You and Mr Right were not raised the same way, in turn, will have different views, thoughts, behaviors, and actions. Even though you may not always agree, there may be times when Mr Right is right. If this happens don't be alarmed. It's fine to be wrong and except correction (as long as Mr Right is encouraging your growth in a loving and respectful manner). Not being right enables us to learn and grow. Also, you may change your opinions on certain issues. Communicating your thoughts with him in a loving and positive way will not only express your feelings but also nourish your relationship.



Financial Emergency
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We all know that things happen in life, which means there will be good times and bad times. However, with the proper prospective, a survival kit and a positive attitude you can overcome any difficulty that you face. When encountering a time of financial crises it is important to be ready for anything in order to  weather the storm. Learning the proper ways to deal with financial situations will assist your in building security.

Stuff The Piggy Bank
Open a savings account. Though you may have heard this many times, you may still be among those who have yet to apply this strategy. Finding the remedy to fully act and feel a sense of security mounts down to investing for your future with a determination to succeed. Be ready to stick to your plan and hold back all urges to do other wise. The best way to save money is to deposit ten percent of your weekly or monthly earnings into your savings. If you can't save ten percent save whatever you are able to, as long as you stick to a number. However, remember the more money you save the more you will have in time of need. When ever you have extra money do not spend it. Instead transfer it to your savings. As long as you are constantly putting money into your saving account and not tacking money out, then you should see your funds grow. Remember that a savings account should be used for emergencies only. Determine what a true emergency is now and stick to your description. Many make the mistake of classifying an emergency as both needs and wants. An emergency account should neither be need nor want. It should be a "can not live without" classification such as food and water.

Food Storage
Water should be the highest in priority when it comes to food and supply storage. Since our body is made up of sixty percent water you can't go wrong with starting your food storage with this basic need. You may decide to recycle your used plastic bottles by filling them with water and keeping them in a dry area. If you plan to store tap water, boil it before storing. Be sure to store it in bottles made for food or water.  Also there has been several recommendation of what to add to tap water in order to store it for long periods of time. It will be up to your discretion as to what method you use and which method will work best for you. If you decide you would rather make the process easier for yourself and you have the money then you can simply buy bottled spring water from the grocery store.

It can be difficult to know where to begin when it comes to food storage especially when your are on a budget. The best way to build food storage is to purchase items, preferably in bulks. Start off your food storage by investing $200 (highly recommended) on nonperishable foods. Make a commitment to always purchase one item every time you go shopping. In order to store for more than one individual you will need to follow the same procedure for each individual. Eventually, as years pass by you will need to replace your food storage with new supplies. A this point however, you will have plenty of food storage to feel secure.

Bulks & Supplies
Whenever you see a nonperishable item on sale buy in bulks. This will help you build your food storage quickly and inexpensively. Think of it this way, you store while you save. It can  be very easy to forget everyday supplies. Items such as a first aid kit, bars of soap, feminine products should be included in your emergency storage. Just as you invest $200 for your food storage, you just have a separate investment amount for supplies. Invest about a $100 or so, it all depends on your needs.




Words of Affirmation
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January 2009

Thinking positive thoughts can increase your ability to see your beauty and encourage you to appreciate yourself. Take some time everyday to pick out one positive phrase and surround your daily activities with a self-boost.

Actions
When you are busy making yourself feel bad eventually the bad sticks. It's just the same when you make yourself feel good. Stay away from saying or thinking negative thoughts, especially thoughts that bring you down.

The Word "Not"
Words like "can" and "will" are very reassuring, however, when they are followed by the word "not" it brings a negative connotation. The word "not" can effect your confidence. It can also slow your progression or stop your success. Remove it from your vocabulary when talking about yourself.

Repeat
To get the most out of words of affirmation you have to repeat, repeat and repeat. This means repeating the words, phrase, sentence(s) many times within your day and revisiting the statement multiple times. Some people like to read one statement for the entire day or week, while others focus on a statement for an entire month(s).

Your Own Personal Flash Cards
You can find words of affirmation cards, books, tapes, etc. A great way to save money while boosting your self-esteem is to write down the things you would like to strengthen. However, instead of writing them as negatives turn them all to positive words, phrases or statements. Once you have them writing down you can turn them into positive statements and transfer them onto flash cards.

Example of Words of Affirmation

Self
Stay away from: I don't like my self. I don't like my life. I am unhappy.
Stick to: I love myself. I love my life. I am happy.

Appearance
Stay away from: I am ugly. I am not beautiful. I am not attractive.
Stick to: I am beautiful. I am lovely. I am attractive.

Goals
Stay away from: I can do it. I am not good enough. I don't know how to.
Stick to: I can do it. I am good enough. I know how to.

Interview
Stay away from : I am not qualified. I will not get this job. I can't do it.
Stick to: I am qualified. I will get this job. I can do it.

Tip: It takes time to restructure the way you feel and think. Words of affirmation is just one of many tools that can help you esteem yourself. It is not an over night process. It can take many months to years to actually see a change in your thinking process.

NOTE: It is important to know when you need to seek professional help to overcome any negative feelings or concerns that you may have. Seek a professional counselor or therapist if you feel you need to be monitored or feel your situation is complex. They can assist you in turning negatives into positives. They can also help you tailor words of affirmation to your individual case.

Build Yourself  Articles
March Out Of Winter & Into Spring

Fall In Love With You

Loving Yourself Today


Trials of Happines

Finding Strength In Others

Letting Go of Bad Situations

Hello?! How Do I Say Not Now?

Tell Mr. Right What You Want

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Take Advantage of Your Features We all have features that we adore. Your eyes, lips, hair and so on. Your features can help you heighten your looks. So take advantage of your features. Find ways to bring out those unique, beautiful and fabulous features. Hair If your favorite feature is your hair, focus on color and style. Keep in mind that colors that may not appeal to you can be among the colors that may work for you. So be open-mined. Whatever the case, always stay away from colors that you feel awkward wearing. Find styles that accentuate the texture and beauty of your mane. Get a hairstylist who and can assist you professionally. If you prefer to color your hair stick to colors that bring out your face or other features such as lips and eyes. Skin Glowing, clean and smooth skin can really boost your confidence. If you have skin problems contact a professional skin doctor or dermatologist. Following simple rules such as drinking 8 glasses of water, washing your face everyday (when wearing makeup washing before bed) can really go a long way. However, speaking with a professional can really help you with your individual situation. If you already have great skin, focus on shades and tones. Knowing the colors that work well with your complexion can help you choose outfits. Other Features Features such as lips, eyes, etc can be heightened by using colors. For eyes, wear shirts and makeup that brings attention to them. You can contact a professional makeup artist to find out what colors work the best for your eyes and lips. If your feature is your eyelashes, smiles, etc you can still take advantage. Go light on makeup and focus on your lashes or simply smiling more often can help you take advantage. Find ways to bring out the feature you adore. Help Me Color Match Do you feel like your clothes never match? Do you wish the world was set in black and white so that fashion wouldn't be so complected? Although thoughts of hiring a fashion guru may sound enticing, learning the rules of today's fashion world can revive your view of color. So don't stress, step away from film noir, put down the yellow pages and read this article. By the time you have finished reading this article, you will have ideas of how color can rejuvenate your closet and give you the confidence to wear every and any color imaginable. Yellow & Green is the new black and white. It is sophisticated and has a touch of freshness. Look for full green or yellow assembles and pair it with accessories such as a bag and shoes of the other color. For example if you are wearing a green outfit accessorize it with yellow accessories and vice versa. Blue & Brown gives you a chic look. There are plenty of great light/dark brown tops that look great with blue slacks. Dresses are another great way to combine the two colors. Also consider wearing jeans with brown tops. Black & White are colors that you can always count on. You can pretty much wear these color by themselves or with other colors. These two colors when assembled together can make a classic statement. One that you just can't resist but to love. Must have black and white attires include black slacks, white shirts both long and short-sleeved, and of course the famous black dress. Black is a uniform color. Black can do what no other color can. Black blends, styles, and resolves color problems quickly and simply. You can always rely on the black to pull you through any fashion madness you may encounter. Black also does wonders with accessories.  A great example of this is the black purse or black pumps. No matter the occasion a black purse or black pumps can turn your simple assemble to a chic stylish outfit. So, when in doubt go for black. Red is one of the bold colors and goes well with almost anything. However, since red can be overwhelming or distracting, combine red assembles with subtle calm colors. The one thing to look out for when it comes to red is how you assemble it with other bold colors. The subtleness of other colors will help it blend in with your attire and not make your wardrobe look awkwardness. Pink & Purple are very feminine colors. They are very beautiful colors that can be favored if you find the right shade that works for your skin tone. See our article on color tones. However, be careful how you mix these colors since they can be very similar depending on the shade. Other Colors & Matching is simply a matter of knowing which colors work with each other. at works with what. With the outlined color concepts we have discusses this far you can kind tell what colors work with what. Try sorting colors by looking at the primary colors and choose the right matches from there. Patterns & Multiple Fabrics are definite no-no's when combined. Stay away from wearing multiple patterns at the same time. Patterns are not meant to be blended but to make a statement all on their own. Multiple patterns gives a disorganized and unsorted look. Stick to one patter in your outfit at a time. Also remember that when wearing patterns stick to accessories of one color that matches the pattern. An example of great pattern coordination is wearing a patterned flowery dress with red pumps and red clutch. The red pumps and red clutch should also match exactly the redness of the pattern in the dress.  As far as fabrics go, stick to one texture at a time. Fabrics should be consistent and not jump from one elaborate texture to another. For example don't wear silk and suede at the same time. It is not attractive and usually makes your outfit look awkward. End of story.
Best Outfit For Any Interview I have received several Ask Celes questions on what to wear to an interview. With so many different types of interviews the answer to the question remains the same. Below you will find the answer to what outfit fits your specific interview or any interview. No Matter The Job ny and all interviews deserve the same professional attire. Do not think that just because you are going to a certain type of interview it justifies wearing something more causal or less professional. You want to make a great impression. Always go dressed to impress. Remember that the interviewer thinks very highly of his or her company and wants you to feel that same way with the way you present yourself. Slack & Skirt Suits ou really can not go wrong with paint suits. As long as you stay within the preferred colors you can make any suit work. Wearing a skirt suit can also be a great fit for your interview. As long as your skirt is knee length you will have no problem feeling uncomfortable or making the interviewer feel uncomfortable. The last thing you want to do is give the interviewer the wrong impression. Skirts that are not too flashy or over-the-top with designs. If you plan to wear a skirt suit make sure that the skirt and jacket are made of the same fabric. Favored Colors & Your Style here is not a specific color that you have to abide by, however, there are certain colors that are definite interview colors. If you are not quite sure if your suit color is appropriate stick to the definite colors which are black and navy blue. You can make the suit yours by adding your own personal sense of style. An example of your own sense of style is the design of the suit. Find a suit that fits your style and complements your shape. Read Esteem Yourself Article: Wrongs & Rights Of A Suit  The Inside Shirt When in doubt about the color of a shirt for an interview it's best to stick with what will definitely work. With interviews, what definitely works is white. if you are not sure of the inside shirt that would be best then stick with a white shirt. However, if you are wearing an all black attire you can also accommodate your outfit with a black shirt or an all blue attire with a matching blue shirt. If you really want to go for a colored shirt stick with colors that are simple and fits nicely with your attire. Stay away from bright-colored shirts. Shoes & Accessories No open toe shoes or casual shoes. Wear close toe shoes. Stay away from shoe colors that are bright/loud. When in doubt stick to black dress shoes. Limit your accessories. One bracelet and small stud earrings will do the job. Comfort & Confidence Most important thing to remember about what you wear to an interview is how you feel in it. Your suit should make you feel great. You should feel comfortable. You should feel confident. You should feel empowered by your suit.  Your Image Matters If you were to see yourself walking down the street what would you think of yourself? When we see someone for the very first time we don't always get the best impression of who they are, yet the first impression is usually how we evaluate them. We automatically register our first impression of any individual with the database "stereotypes" we acquire through our personal experiences, statistics, the media, friends, etc. In turn, we formulate who we "assume" an individual may be in a matter of seconds. We may judge them based on their wardrobe, makeup, hair, car, voice (accent), and so forth. Then we make assumptions on their personality, lifestyle, and interests. Sometimes we may be right on target with the first impression, however, many times we are very wrong. What you see is not always what you get. Say you meet person A, who looks like they haven't taken a bath in a couple of days, how would you react to them? Would it be the same way you would react to person B, who looks fresh and clean? The irony is that these two individuals could be the opposite of what you see and you would not even know. Person B who looks like they took a bath might not have taken a bath for months but person A took a bath and unfortunately got dirty during the day for whatever reason. Thus, your perception of person A and B could be totally wrong and you were misguided by their image. Another example of first impressions theory: Person A and B are going to an interview for the same job. They both arrive at the same time. The interviewer approaches both of the interviewees, person A and B. Person A's clothing is disorderly, wrinkled, and maybe is not quiet appropriate for an interview. Person B's clothing is orderly, clean and they look sharp and are wearing interview appropriate clothing. Who should get the job? Which person will the interviewer want to interview and why? Though sad but very true, the interviewer may have already chosen a candidate (because of the first impression of person A and B) for the job without even speaking to or viewing both candidates credentials. Unfortunately, person A might be the best candidate for the position, yet, because of their persona they may not have a fear opportunity with the interviewer. Before you go shopping make sure that you go through your wardrobe. This way you will know what you really need and what you would like to replace. Make a list of needed items and stick to your list. Do not go shopping blindfolded. If you go shopping without an idea of what you really need you will find yourself buying unnecessary items. As you shop refer to your shopping questionnaire. It will help you make educated price evaluations, decipherer the difference between wants and needs, and eliminate items that are not necessary. his will help you avoid having to stay in long lines during this holiday season. Past Events Think of outfits that you have assembled in past events. Your closet is full of outfits that you have worn for past events. If you feel like the outfit will be noticeable find ways to give it new life. For example using accessory that will give it a new style. Colors & Shades Stick to flattering colors and shades for you. You will be the jollies person at any event with all the complements when you go with the right shades and colors that work for you. Finding and knowing the right colors/shades for you will make the task of finding a becoming outfit an easy task. Experimenting Stay away from daring outfits. This is certainly not the time to experiment or try new things. Stick with styles and colors you are comfortable with. The outfits that you adore that works well for you should be your number one choices. Don't go with outfits that you are unfamiliar with and are not so sure about. If you go far from your comfort zone you may regret the pictures of you in your outfit for years to come. The No New Shoes Rule Why do we buy shoes that hurt? This is a question that we may never figure out but in the mean time let's stop doing it. What you wear on your feet will certainly be a style statement, however, wearing shoes that are comfortable is key to having a great time at a party. So for starts, please stay away from new shoes. You may think this a great time to but new shoes it is not. Usually it has an opposite effect. Your new shoes may be perfect for the event yet it may have you walking barefoot or sitting down all night long. The last thing you what is to be in pain when you should be enjoying yourself. Shopping For Outfits If there is no way out of a shopping trip make sure you go early in the morning to avoid the long lines. Take time to really find the best outfit for you. Search for outfits that will not only work well for the event that you are attending but will also go great with your wardrobe. During your shopping trip, keep in mind that finding the right out should mean finding an outfit that can be worn to multiple events the out the year. Assembling Your Accessories Who doesn't like a collection of great bags or shoes? Many women adore their handbags and shoes, collecting them by the dozens. However, for those who are unable to collect shoes and bags by the dozen or those who may want to find new ways to wear the old, let's look at some of your options. Simplify Items that are used to heighten your style and complement your attire can make or brake your ideal vision of your fashion style. To stay connected to the fashion statement you have in mind focus on  your outfit when it comes to wearing accessories. Keeping your accessories simple and detail oriented is essential. Bags & Shoes When shopping for bags and shoes focus on durability, wardrobe driven colors, multiple outfit coordination and style/occasion. With so many fancy and cute bags it may be hard to really focus on the onces that will work for you. When selecting bags search for bags that accommodate your needs. Purchasing shoes can be very difficult. Stay away from purchases shoes that keep you uncomfortable. Necklaces, Bracelet, Earrings & Other Accessories When looking for the right necklace or bracelet to adore your outfit the type of occasion you are attending should determine your accessories. Also consider your own personal style and what makes you unique. Don't be afraid to wear an accessory that complements your own sense of style. However, be sure to limit the amount no matter the occasion. In many cases less is more.Tips: Stay away from buying items that you will only wear once. This will leave you with limited amount of coordination and limits your spending ability. Go for the accessories that can give you the most for your money. Shop for What Is Right For You What we wear influences the way we feel about our appearance. Stay within your size limit and only purchase outfits that fit. Find the right colors/shades. You may find that certain colors and shades work better for you. Purchase what feels comfortable. If you are not comfortable with an outfit don't purchase it. Regardless of discounts and inexpensive clothing purchasing outfits that complement your figure. So to answer the commonly asked question: Do I look fat in this? No. As long as you focus on keeping you body healthy, you will not only look great you will feel great too. Tips: Learn to be confident in the way you look and love your style by clicking here. How Do You Imagine Your Image? So, what do these two examples have to do with you? Well, first don't judge a book (person) by it's (their) cover (persona), however, be ready to be judged by yours. As we judge, the person being judged may be the most kindest, compassionate and trustworthy person you will ever meet but we may never know because we have already stereotyped them unfairly. However, we all are constantly judging and being judge merely on our appearance which seems to be a natural process that is very difficult to control but can be saved by us balancing the urge to give each individual a chance even after our first impression of them. Due to the first impression concept, everyone's persona including our own is very crucial to how we are seen and represented. Yet, sometimes (mostly unintentionally) we may disregard and dismiss the first impression theory or simply assuming that it does not apply to us. However, we continue to apply the concept to those that we meet because we can not resist the natural process of doing so. I know who I am and others will too. Thinking that our own perspective of ourselves will shine through when we meet others (regardless of how we look) doesn't always work because first impressions can be assumed in less then five seconds. Thus, trying to beat the first impression theory before it happens can and may be a false concept. Who Cares? Everyone cares! Knowing that first impression is significant to how we are perceived, it is important that we present ourselves the way we want people to see us. As you are evaluating others they are doing the same to you. It a natural process. How can I get others to see me the way I want to be seen? Dress the part. This doesn't mean to go out and buy expensive clothes. You don't have to spend a penny to dress the part. Simply dress how you would like to be seen. For example: We all want to be seen as decent caring, responsible individuals. Then we must keep our clothes clean, orderly and presentable. Don't spend time buying clothes that you will latter toss in your closets floor. You must care for your clothes. If you want to dress a certain way but find it to be costly then you are not looking in the right stores. All clothing store prices differ and have selections of styles. Just find the right stores that work for you and your budget. Also ask close friends were they shop (if their style appeals to you) or where you could for specific outfits for your budget. Dress carefully. Know what to wear for what occasion. Coming in the proper attire for occasions are mandatory when it comes to first impressions. It says you are responsible, professional and dependable. For an example: If you are going to an interview come in a blue or black suit. Making sure your attire is neat, clean and orderly. You will automatically win points for dressing appropriately. Don't let negative emotions drive you. Sometimes, we may dress a certain way and not realize that it is our emotions that drives us to dress that way. So dress how you want to feel happy dress in a happy fashion. Wear colors that make you feel joyful. Remember that what you wear can build your confidence. You may receive complements or simply feel great in your outfit. If you feel great in what you are wearing, then congratulations - you are building confidence. If your are feeling confident to start with keep it going continue to dress confidently. The first impressions theory also apply to makeup, hair and demeanor. Therefore, be sure your entire appearance is how you want to present yourself (from head to toe) and be confident. Tip: As a double edged sword first impressions can both help but also can hinder. It would be nice to say that we do not judge by first impressions and others will not judge you only by appearance but we are still along ways away from that. In the mean time, lets try to progress by giving others a fear chance and not be judgmental bases on first impressions and learn to appear the way we want to be seen. What To Wear To A Wedding
You've been invited to your friend's wedding. You are thrilled and exited to be there for the special occasion.  However, with so many dress code rules that surrounds a wedding you are perplexed as to what to wear. As you look through your wardrobe you may become frustrated. Addressing the rules before you browse your wardrobe can help you narrow your choices and element embracing moment during and in the aftermath of the wedding (i.e photos). Dress of Gloom Do not go to the wedding dressed in an attire as though a groomsman broke your heart the day before the wedding. This is not a color issue but mainly related to style of dress. Colors that are dark can be worn.  Focus of fun, friendly and cute styles. Also, don't go for the dresses that you dread wearing. Many times what you wear is what you feel. Refrain from wearing a dress that you don't find attractive. Stay away from wearing anything that you feel uncomfortable in or not sure of. It is really important that you are sure of what you are wearing. Dress to Impress Out of all the many places to find love (if your looking), a wedding is the perfect place. No matter the occasion dressing in a manner that gives you a sense of confidence and style is always a must. Make sure that you are proud of what you have decided to wear. Your dress should complement your figure. You should feel a sense of comfort in your chosen dress. Wearing White The bride has on white does that mean it's off limits? No. You can wear white. This goes back to the importance of the style of dress. As long as your dress is not to attention striving/seeking, over the top "I'm the bride"dress. Suppose your not sure if your dress is over the top? Selecting your dress days before the wedding can solve this simple problem. By selecting your dress days before you have time to consult with a close friend. If you are still unsure then simply walk away from the dress and explore other dress options or begin your search again. Outdressing the Bride It could be difficult to really outdress the bride unless you are trying hard to do so. Since the bride is mostly in a ensemble that is made to attract attention it is very obvious that your dress will be most likely suitable for the wedding. However, as difficult as it may seem to outdress the bride some people sure know how to dress up for an event. Unless you are a bridesmaid or maid of honor stay away from overdoing it (i.e. ballroom style dresses). Look for dresses that do not draw attention to you. Also consider your hairstyle as well as accessories. If you are wear a simple dress then you should be fine. Stay close to common colors in stead of bright of the wall colors. Whether the bride is your best friend or you are in the grooms party remember that it is the bride's day. You are there to support the bride. It is her day to shine. Hey, she deserves it and you deserve to be confident, comfortable, and radiant in whatever you choose to wear. The last thing you want to remember when you see picture of the wedding (which will be an eternal reminder) is how much you disliked your dress or worst how embraced you felt wearing it. Tip: Try to get specific dress code requirements. If you are able to find out exactly the type of attire (i.e. casual, formal, etc.) the wedding party is requesting, work within the specific attire category and don't shift from it. 
Your Perfect Little Black Dress Every woman needs the perfect little black dress (lbd). Whether you are going to a party, a date or attending a special event, the perfect lbd works for any and all occasions. However, finding the perfect lbd can sometimes be over-whelming and frustrating. There are a few simple guidelines to follow in the process of finding your perfect lbd. Do Your Research Before attempting to shop for your lbd spend sometime researching what style of dress you prefer. There are a variety of choices, from designers to several styles. Take your time in selecting which designer or style you prefer. Also consider your budget. How much are you willing to spend on your dress? If you are not sure where to start looking, ask a friend who knows you well enough to recommend a place that suits your style. Be especially attentive when speaking to friends that share your fashion sense and style. On-Line Shopping Don't expect the perfect dress to drop out of the sky. Be ready to do some serious shopping. If you decide to shop on-line make sure that the dress can be returned with a full refund just in case it doesn'tfit properly. In addition, there's always the what-you-saw-is-not-what-you-got aspect of on-line shopping. Even if you are not planning to shop on-line, you may find it very helpful to search through the different styles on-line first. This way, you will be able to consider your options right in the comfort of your own home before you make the journey to the store. By browsing on-line you will at least know what stores that sell the styles you like. Of course, once you get to the store, trying on the lbd may present a whole new set of trials.  Eventually you will find your perfect lbd. Your Comfort Make sure that the dress you buy will be comfortable. The last thing you want is to feel uncomfortable in your lbd. When searching for the right dress don't make the mistake of thinking that you can somehow make it work. If you see a dress that looks great on the rack but when on you is all too unflattering. Don't be fool! Do not buy this dress! Even if it appears to be what you were looking for. Simply, place the dress where you found it and step away. Continue your search.100% Satisfied We sometimes make the mistake of buying outfits that we may not be totally in favor. However, because of our desire to have it, we ignore our intuition and proceed to make the purchase. You might find yourself thinking, "I'll just lose a few pounds," "I'll get it tailored," "There has to be something in my closet that will help this outfit," "It's just so cute and in style!"  These are some of the excuses that you may find yourself making in order to justify your purchase. Even with all the excuses these items just end up taking space in your closet. You may wind up never actually wearing it though you may continue telling yourself that you will. Save yourself the trouble. Don't look for a lbd that doesn't satisfy you one hundred percent! Your "Perfect" LBD It's amazing how an outfit can boost your esteem, build your confidence, make you feel elegant and accent your beauty. If there is such an article of clothing, your lbd should be it. When you put on the perfect dress you will know it. There will be no denying the feeling of, "I want this dress. Now!" You will feel elegant and beautiful. It will be perfect. That's why it will be the perfect little black dress for you! Black's Not My Color So you don't think you look flattering in black. Pick the color that works for you. Make sure the color you pick is a color that complements your look, color, shade and style. Once you have picked the color try to find the right dress that will not be to distracting in that specific color. Stay away from colors that are too bright. If you are going out to an evening event it may be to distracting or you may simply feel out of place. Especially when you see everyone else in more calm and neutral colors. Less Is More Jewelry - Make sure that your jewelry is befitting for your dress. Don't over do it. Keep it nice and simple. A simple bracelet and earrings should be enough. You want to let your dress do all the work. Your jewelry should be complementing your dress not overshadowing. So, don't over do it with jewelry. Shoes & Purse - Your shoes and purse should be simple and elegant. Pick the shoes and purse to make your dress fit the occasion. With the right shoes and purse you will indeed look and feel like a million bucks. Make-up - Your make-up should be very subtle. This way your natural beauty will complement your attire. Try wearing natural colors to blend in with the elegance and simplicity of your attire. Save It Once you are all dressed up, make sure you document your look by taking a picture of yourself. Take a picture of the dress and the accessories that worked with the dress. This way you can go back when you want to re-do the look. Plus, who doesn't want to see the dress that made your look and feel gorgeous! There are so many ways to accessorize according to the latest fashions and reintroduce your lbd. You should be able to wear your lbd over and over again! Have you found the prefect lbd? Tell us you experience.
Who Doesn't Like An Extra Pair Of Shoes? As you walk into a shoe store, you find it. The perfect shoes. Yes, it's the one. The one you have been searching for that will complete all your wardrobe coordination problems. It can be yours for a steep amount. Since you just got your eagerly awaited paycheck, you speed to the counter and check out. Now, you can finally add it to the hundred and twenty-four shoes you already own. Which by the way, are in your closet collecting dust. When you take a close look at your closet, do you find that you have a slew of clothing, shoes, purses and accessories that you barely use? Do you have a closet full of clothes, yet can't find anything to wear? Do you have clothes that you have either out grown or don't fit anymore? Are some of the clothes in your closet not appealing to you? Do you spend 10 to 15 minutes looking for an outfit to wear? Have you bought a shirt, pant or accessory, just to find out that you already have one just like it? Are your clothes scattered and you have no clue how to start to organize your closet? Any of these wardrobe mismanagement situations can happen for one or more reasons. Not having a proper way to organize, manage and wear your clothes can be frustrating and leave you feeling hopeless. Not being able to find ways to coordinate colors, styles and designs could make you feel like your left without many wardrobe choices. Also, simply having an urge to buy items spontaneously or splurge can build-up a perplex wardrobe situation. Organize & Revamp
Most of us don't wear every single item in our closet. At times, we may not even realize it, since we are interested in the main outfits that we love. So we ignore the rest. However, not realizing that the underused items could be beneficial to us as well if organized properly. You can make the most out of every single piece of (wanted) clothing (as well as shoes, purses and accessories) and finally achieve organization by revamping your closet. However, to do this efficiently, you must be willing to start from scratch.- Remove all articles of clothing, shoes, purses, etc (from closet). This way you will be able to fully account for all items. - Evaluate what you like about each piece, placing them with outfits that either coordinate or are similar. - Group clothing by sections and colors (black shirts, blue slacks, black paints, blue jeans, white tees, etc). - Arrange each piece of clothing within your closet back, sorting them into categorizes. - Fold clothes that don't have a great chance of wrinkling. - Hang clothes that may wrinkle. You may also decide to be specific in how and where you hang expensive, work or particular occasion clothing. Use durable hangers (keeps clothes from falling and keeps closet neater). - Toss unwanted items (doesn't fit, out of style, don't appeal to you, unwearable, even the ones you "think" you might wear but you know you never do).
- Take note of what article of clothing you have, keeping in mind the items that you don't wear often. This will help you implement underused items in your outfits. Likewise, you will know what you need and what you already own. It will also assist you in making better choices in outfit decisions, so you can wear every piece of clothing. You may even feel like you are wearing a new outfit everyday, since you have an organized variety to select from. Lucky you!
GoodwillAll the clothes, shoes, purses that fit the "toss" category (doesn't fit, out of style, don't appeal to you, unwearable, will never wear) should be immediately sent to goodwill or to other charity donation facilities and organizations. Be ready to take this step of permanently giving your clothes away. Sometimes, we get really attached to certain items that it may be difficult (even painful) to let them go. But once you have made a decision, stick to it. You are serving and assisting others. Be proud of yourself. Spontaneous Shopper Sometime, you may buy an article of clothing and in a matter of days or months forget that you bought the item. You may then go shopping latter and buy a similar item (or even the same item) not remembering that you have it at home. Other times, you will decide to buy an item spontaneously, not sure how or what it will coordinate with. However, with an organized closet, before attempting to go shopping just taking a quick look at what you already have may save you lots of money and time. Once you have taken the step of evaluating the items in your closet, you can be aware of the type of clothing that will add variety to your wardrobe and coordinate with your style. With the continuous up-keep of your closet (once you have revamped and organized it) many of these spontaneous shopping dilemmas will cease. Splurging There is nothing wrong with splurging once in a while. However, some of us can't help but to shop spontaneously and splurge often. You may have an urge to buy. If you can't help yourself, then shop for (or buy) things that can improve your life and future security. - Invest your money in something that can give you some future reassurance like mutual funds, Roth IRAs, college savings, etc. - Extra mortgage payment can come in handy. Take your extra spending money and pay more on your mortgage. Talk to your mortgage company to see what their polices are when it comes to extra payments. Find out if it can benefit you to make extra payments. Or simply put the extra amount in a savings account for emergency mortgage payment. - Pay off Debt. Credit cards, loans, car payments, medical bills, etc. - Safer items. Invest in buying a safer car (reliability and protection), emergency preparedness items (food storage), environmentally friendly items (go green). - Save for rainy days. Rainy days happen. When the rain comes it usually pours. Be ready for the storm. Save, save, save. It will come in handy. - Go on quality vacations. Ok, so some of us just like to work and don't really care very much about the money, however, most of us make money to feed our family, pay bills and have (hopefully) a little extra to spend on what we would really like to do. Which is usually spend it on ourselves, our family members or friends. So do it! Save as much as you can and go on a vacation with those you love! You've been working so hard, take a break! In the end, any of us wouldn't mind having an extra pairs of shoes but what matters is that we put it to good use. Let's be grateful for what we have and not take any thing (whether it's a article of clothing or something of much more value) for granted, invest for our future instead of having frequent spontaneous spending, and simply give to others so they can be able to put their best foot forward. Don't Spend A Million Bucks When you look through a magazine you may not be able to afford the items but you can still afford the style. You don't have to spend a ton of money to achieve your desired look. Learn to achieve the look you want without breaking the bank. Copy Cat If you just have to have that magazine outfit or style, becoming a copy cat may be your best bet. Try to copy the style to the very last detail. For example, if a short sleeve shirt has lace around the top of the neck area look for a short sleeve shirt that has lace around the neck area. Get as specific as possible. You may have to do a lot of searching to recreate the look, however, if you just look for the individual pieces gradually eventually you will acheieve your desired look. Recreating an outfit can be fun especially when you spend a lots less then the original outfit.
Stay Focused When shopping for a particular style or outfit you saw in a magazine try to focus on the style and design of the outfit. Do not focus on the color until you find the style of outfit. The more it appear to be the same look and design that better the outfit will turn out to assemble the outfit you are trying to recreate. Specific Style or Special Occasions If you are searching for a certain style, shopping on line can give you the ability to narrow the store that have your choices. Special occasion outfits can be trick especially if you don't know what type of wardrobe the occasion calls far. Find ways to narrow your style for the occasion by finding out as much details as possible about the occasion. If you are unsure as to what type of outfit a certain occasion requires then do some serious research before the day of the event. Uniqueness It always great to add your own style and uniqueness to the outfit. There is nothing more you then to add your own sense of style and taste to a particular outfit. One you have accomplished the style you want add your own personal touch to make it simply yours. So, the next time you look through a magazine or see someone with an outfit that you just love, know that you can afford the style by shopping inexpensively for the same outfit. Wrongs & Rights Of A Suit When it comes to finding the perfect suit don't settle for one that is unflattering and uncomfortable. Finding the right fit, style, comfort and color in a suit is crucial when finding the perfect suit for you. Learn to differentiate the right ways to purchasing a suit from the wrong ways. Fit Wrong: Feeling awkward and uncomfortable. Not feeling one hundred percent confidence. Right: Feeling confident. Knowing that it fits perfectly. It makes you look great and it is tailored to your shape. Cost Wrong: Buying the first suit that looks like it will fit. Assuming that the more expensive the suit the better. Right: Trying on several suits from different stores to get the perfect fit and the perfect price for your budget. Style Wrong: Looking for styles that does not fit your personality. It will only make you feel uncomfortable and will not boost your confidence. Right: Searching for suits that fit your own unique style. You will feel both comfortable and confident. Color Wrong: The colors will not fit your style or color shades. Right: Sticking to the shade of colors that are best for your skin tone. Looking for colors that goes with your skin tone. Find your skin tone colors by clicking here. Tips: Don't forget that the inside shirt and accessories that you incorporate with your suit can really accent the look of your suit.