clothes wearing a new shirt entire outfit. change our clothes,  wardrobe clothing wardrobe clothing fits and fits clothes clothes clothing a jacket or shawl a jacket or a shawl jacket in the car wardrobe purse wardrobe purse. everyday wear wardrobe malfunction wardrobe wardrobe wardrobe your face face throw water wash your face in the morning and then apply your makeup. Taking care of your face takes time, dedication, and effort. If you want to have flawless skin you will need to stick to a routine. You also need a few ingredients that can give you the most successful results. You're in luck because this article will list the main ingredients and give you tips to getting healthy, flawless skin. All that's left is you. see a difference in your skin. important for your body. Your body tends to build up toxins in your system over time by various things for various reasons. When you drink water, it removes and cleanses those toxins from your body. It's kind of like giving the inside of your body a bath. If the outside of your body gets bathe regularly, then the inside of your body deserves the same treatment. When you are regularly drinking a recommended amount of water daily, then you are removing the toxins from your body, which means you are reducing the amount of oil in your face that creates those nasty bumps. to clear those toxins from your body. While drinking the recommended amount of water daily, another important ingredient for healthy flawless skin is vitamins. Value of Vitamins Add vitamins to your daily routine. May people in the world are deficient in one vitamin or another. Vitamins do tons of wonders for us and our bodies. Vitamins help grow and repair our bodies in so many ways we do not see or recognize. Taking vitamins helps you try to maintain a healthy balance in your body, because you are getting the healthy supplements you need. You will see your skin begin to show a natural glow. A glow that no bronzer or make up can give you. If you continued on a daily vitamin regimen, you should begin to see your skin brighten in its own natural way. Day & Night Wash The next step to a "clean and clear" face is to wash your face daily morning and night. Washing your face helps to remove dirt and dead skin cells that is on your face. When you don't wash your face, the dirt and dead skin cells build upon your face clogging your pores, in which they cannot breathe, resulting into an unhappy pimpled face. Your pores need to breathe just as you do. Remember, you can not be lazy on this step. Most people begin the routine of washing their face daily, morning and night, but then they slowly discontinue the process and ask themselves a few days later, "Why isn't my skin clear?" It's not clear because you stopped your regimen! If you are saying to yourself right now, "Ugh, I don't have enough time." or "It is too much effort.", then you will not see the best results. The Best Cleanser wash your face morning and night with a face cleanser. best type of face cleanser that is for you. A face cleanser may work for your friend but not for you, because everyone's face is different. Do some thorough research for the skin type you have and the types of face cleansers you could use. Once you have found some face cleansers, it's time to begin to try them out to see if it will help you. It is understandable that you are in a hurry to achieve a flawless look but don't use the cleanser for two days and then toss it away because you assume it doesn't work for you. You should continuously use the cleanser for a minimum of 4 weeks, to determine if you see some improvement or not. Make sure that you are washing your face morning and night or washing your face as the directions on the cleanser tells you to. Be diligent and you will be happy with your results. Moisturize, Moisturize, & Moisturize Moisturizing your face is another important step to achieving flawless skin. Moisturizing your face helps to keep your skin from drying up and also keeps your skin nice and soft.  It is best to moisturize your face with something that is oil free and fragrant free. Again do thorough research on the type of moisturizer you should purchase for your skin type. You are what you think, you are what you do, and you are what you eat. To obtain flawless skin you have to watch what you eat. Eating a lot of oily and greasy foods can lead to an increase of breakouts on your face. Begin to eat healthier one day at a time to improve your diet. A healthy diet produces healthy skin, and healthy skin dramatically increases your chances of having flawless skin. We're all hoping for it to come soon.  The warm weather, shining sun and the cool breeze. It's such a great time of the year. With the seasons changing, our wardrobes change along with it. We begin to wear lighter clothing, flowy dresses and skirts. This year when making the transition, make it chic, savy, and playful. Tips for Dresses & Skirts Think of spring as a playful and happy type of season. Imagine how you can incorporate it into dresses and skirts. Your dresses and skirts should be feminine and playful. Be sure to wear your dresses and skirts in a manner that represents you best. You don't want to wear anything that gives the wrong impression of who you are. You are a divine being, let others treat you with respect by observing what you wear. Tips for Shirts Bright colors and pastels are in! Wear bright colored shirts that have a soft tone. The best colors to wear are pastel colors. These colors are bright but still have a soft tone to them. A good combination to use would be to wear bright colored shirts as the main base to your outfit, then add a little bit of darker colors to your outfit here and there. For example wearing a blue pastel shirt with some dark brown jewelry, or yellow pastel shirt with a dark green tank top underneath that shows a little bit of the color. Wearing blouses in the springtime is also a plus; it gives you that playful feel which works well in the spring. Make sure to mix the colors, picking shades that work well together, other wise it could lead to a big wardrobe disaster. Tips for Wearing Sandals Another great plus during the warmer weather is the ability to wear sandals. Bright colors on toenails do not quite fit in with the spring season. So save those bright color nail polish for the summer time. During the springtime wear neutral deep colors that will give a nice finish. For example nice plum color or forest green or deep blue will work. Colors like these will give a good balance to the rest of your spring outfit. Knowing Your Seasons When looking in the closet to select your wardrobe, ask yourself, "Does this work for the feel of spring?" Get into the habit of knowing what will work and what does not work for different seasons of the year. Every season you can look fantastic and chic! Start now to get in the rhythm of knowing what to wear each season. declare your summer independence from blow dryers, straighteners, and curling irons today. It's difficult to maintain heat-it-to-achieve-it styles in the summer. The sun is scorching hot and washing your hair becomes more frequent. Thermal styling tools can give you an instant look, but constant heat styling can thin and damage natural, color- and chemically-treated hair.  Let your hair cool off by trying alternative no- to- low heat methods for volume, texture, or sleekness. .Flip your hair upside down using a paddle brush, smoothing the back of your hair from the nape to the front (Optional: For extra hold, lightly spritz your hair with alcohol-free hairspray) When you use your heat styling tools less, your strands get a chance to breathe. Challenge yourself to give up heat for two weeks and evaluate your hair.  If it hasn't been severely damaged by heat, you may notice that your hair looks and feels healthier and stronger. Each low-to-no heat method requires less stress on your hair and an overall healthy approach to your styling routine. Spend the rest of summer working on your tan, and not your hair. Eliminate Puffy Eyes Before you wash your face in the mornings, use a cue tip to lightly dab a very small amount of aloe vera gel (revered for its healing, anti-inflammatory, and cooling properties) over your eyes. Leave the gel on your eyes for five to ten minutes and then wash your face with your regular cleanser. You will you feel instantly refreshed and your eyes will look brighter and more youthful. The late-night puffiness around your eyes will begin to disappear. Good morning, Sunshine! Banish Rough Skin To remedy dry and cracked skin, formulate your own brown sugar scrub body treatment. The natural glycolic acid found in sugar works to gently slough off dead skin cells to reveal brighter skin. massage your sugar scrub to dampened skin. To lock in moisture, towel-pat dry and apply your lotion while your skin is slightly damp. Save your skin from damaging sun rays with a generous amount of sunscreen. Nothing can wreak havoc on your skin like sun damage. a sunscreen with SPF 15 may allow you to stay in the sun for 150 minutes without getting burned. However, even if you use sunscreen, try to chill in the shade for most of the day and feel fabulous in a big floppy hat for maximum skin protection. Your hair may be fighting the common hair cold right now- dryness, breakage, and dullness- due to the harsh weather. balance of protein and moisture in your hair. When the moisture and protein levels in your hair are in sync, you will notice less breakage, length retention, and an overall increase in the health of your hair. If your hair is hard, rough, or brittle you may need a deep conditioning treatment. This will help you restore softness to your hair and smooth your cuticle, the outermost layer of your hair strand.  When applying a deep conditioning treatment, try to use a conditioner that is water-based and contains at least one humectant.  Any product that lists humectants- propylene glycol, honey, glycerin- and water at the top of their ingredient list will work best to help your hair stay soft and moisturized. No More Weather Hair Worries When rain arrives unexpectedly, you aren't running to find shelter or making a make-shift umbrella out of a newspaper or your purse. You can play in the rain without worrying about you kinky hair getting ruined. Even in humidity, you can tie your hair back and let the humidity amplify your curls and get unbelievable volume. Curly girls who don't enjoy frizz or undefined curls can still leave the house and venture into high-humidity weather. Just be sure to apply a silicone-free styling serum on dry hair to keep your curls in sync. Your Facial Features Pop Some women with more traditional African features -full lips, broad nose, and high cheekbones- can appear more youthful with curly hair than straight hair. Flat hair can make these facial features seem larger than they actually are, and hide its true beauty. Shorter, tightly curled hair seems to defy gravity when worn out in an Afro style. It "lifts" the face and draws more attention to the eyes and cheekbones. You Become Healthier many times have you heard, "I know I need to go to the gym, but I don't want to mess up my hair"? When you wear your hair curly, you don't have to make the choice of having either a great head of hair or a great body. Let's be honest, your hair needs more than the perfect shampoo and conditioner. To give you hair optimum health, you have to eat right and exercise. When you have naturally curly hair, you no longer worry about your hair "reverting" when you sweat from a work-out. To freshen your curls after the gym, you can water-rinse or cleanse you hair with a sulfate-free shampoo. You Can Experiment with Color When you let your natural tresses roam free and treat it with care, you can experiment with more color without worrying about double-processing your hair with chemicals or daily doses of heat. If you apply heat on a daily basis or wear a relaxer, adding another hair-altering chemical like color to the mix can be a recipe for dryness and breakage. Even with chemical-free hair, color can still be damaging.  Look for alternative and gentler coloring options like Henna or semi-permanent glosses. Maintain a healthier head of hair with color by putting the relaxer away, and treating your hair with nourishing products formulated for color-treated hair.Running to the salon every few weeks to tame those "unruly roots" is no longer your concern. Salon chemical and hair straightening services can cost upwards of fifty dollars per visit. Now that you've embraced the beauty of your bouncy ringlets, your wallet is packed with extra cash. Indulge your hair with at-home nourishing treatments using deep conditioners and essential oils. The next time you see a woman with an eye-catching hair style or lustrous curls, give her a compliment. Whether you have a spouse to give you roses or not, give yourself a love letter this month that highlights every feature you love to play up, make your hair one of your favorite features. Whether your hair is short or long, curly or straight, it is beautiful and deserves to feel loved. The New Year is your time to shine. Your hair should be no exception. If you need more products just to fake a healthy appearance from split ends, dullness, or limp hair, January may be the perfect time to start over.  A healthy hair goal can be achieved if you start with the right plan.  Trim Your Ends Get rid of split, frayed, and heat-damaged ends with a professional trim. Your hair cannot look its best when damaged ends are getting all of the attention.  A trim can be anywhere from one-fourth of an inch to two inches, depending on the amount of damage. If you are apprehensive about getting a trim, you can do minimal shaping each month. However, eventually all the damaged ends will need to be cut off. Once damaged ends are removed, your hair will instantly look fuller, smoother, and healthier. Categorize your products (shampoos, conditioners, styling crème, etc.) and select one from each that works the best for your hair. The products that you do not select can be given away to friends, thrown out, or saved for the summer time. With a simple selection of tried and true products, your hair can be pampered and nourished with the correct products that work best on your hair. Commit to a Hair Care Schedule Consistently bathe your hair in deep conditioning, hot oil, and protein treatments. Your hair type and needs will determine how often you should do each treatment. There should be a healthy balance of protein and moisture to promote softer and stronger strands. Have a trusted stylist evaluate your hair. He or she will be able to help you commit to a healthy hair care schedule and help decide what healthy hair practices would work best for you.Handle Hair with Care Now that you are fully invested into your customized healthy hair journey, be gentle to your strands. Avoid styles that pull at the scalp and edges of your hair. The corners of your eyes should not meet at your scalp line. Instead, style your hair into loose, chic ponytails and buns. Keep hair manipulation low, only using proper combs and brushes sparingly and gently to detangle and style hair. Always moisturize and protect the ends of your hair to minimize split ends.  Treat your hair with care, and it will flourish throughout the New Year. Curly hair has been called many names: beautiful, unique, unkempt, trendy, unprofessional, rebellious, romantic, lustrous, and the list goes on. Within the past five years, major hair companies have realized that curly hair is also very "marketable". When you listen to your hair and notice what it likes, your curly hair can become synonymous with another word - healthy.You are mingling at a party and in walks a bombshell in a fitted jacket, the best pair of skinny jeans you have seen, a head full of luscious curls, and a confident laugh that fills the room.  You immediately envy the stillettoed goddess.  improve your look and overall confidence.  With minor changes and implementing the following "secrets" you will have the tools to always feel confident and look and your best. Wear Your Favorite Outfit When you like what you are wearing your confidence level rises.  However, there are a few fashion tips you want to keep in mind.  Tailored waistlines on dresses or jackets create slimming effects and pencil skirts hide upper leg blemishes and highlight calves.  Black is always slimming but spice it up with red accents (scarf, shoes, jewelry).  Highlight your best feature to feel extra sexy. Hair Is Important Many women overlook the importance of a well coiffed do.  This year, to the benefit of all women, volume and curls are in.  Try using hot rollers because they are easy to use, quick, and will not damage your hair.  They create a loose curl that softens any look.  Leave your hair down.  If this drives you crazy, use a decorative clip to sweep up a side.  If you don't have rollers, use a curling iron to add volume and curls to your tresses. The Arsenal Of Beauty Secrets These are wonderful beauty weapons used by many Hollywood stars. Most women are so good at these "tricks" that the result appears to be natural. Non Make-up Wearers You are blessed to have a fresh clean look naturally.  For a special event, it is nice to wear a minimal amount of make-up for a more formal look.  If you don't wear make-up, mascara and lip-gloss will enhance your look.  Fake Eyelashes Fake eyelashes are a great way to widen the eye and create a come-hither look.  The packs with sections or individual lashes rather than the full strip are easier to apply and look more natural.  Apply them to the outer corner of your eye following the natural lash line.  It will add a little length and enhance the look of the eye. Curly hair is a commitment, a long-term relationship. It is more prone to splitting up, as in split ends. It is constantly changing its mood, one day it's a poof, then it's a tangled nightmare. Style & Class Let's face it baggy jeans, baggy t-shirts, and over-sized flannels are not stylish. Anything that may fall into that category needs to be removed from your closet now! Also remove anything that is too tight. Clothes that are too tight are never in style however, don't confuse fitted with too tight. Confidence is Fashion There is nothing more sexy to a man than a woman that walks into the room with confidence. Make sure that whatever it is your wearing you feel great in it. Whether you are running errands or going out you should always feel confident in what you are wearing. The 4 Must-Haves A fitted jacket is essential this fall. Whether you are wearing it with your dress slacks to work or with your trendy worn jeans, a fitted jacket is a must have! Fitted Jacket For the tall and slim- Military jacket For the athletic build- tattered Levi jacket For the curvy- lightweight trench Tall Boots Tall boots make heads turn. You will want to splurge on this buy and ensure that you are getting good quality. They are great for the office or for a night out on the town. For the office put on a pair of tights with a skirt and for the night out leave the tights at home. The Perfect Pair of Jeans Every woman should have a pair of jeans that shape her figure, gives her comfort and builds her confidence. For this fall go for a fitted boot cut with embellishment on the back pockets or for the tall and slim woman go with the skinny jean and tuck them in your tall boots. Large Leather Hobo Handbag With the chill in the air a large hobo is needed. It will carry all your normal hand bag items like your wallet, phone, water bottle, ect. You can put a scarf and gloves in there too. To keep it stylish go with something that has a rock star edge to it. Just remember to control the amount of rock star. Shop around for the perfect hobo for you. Remember that every woman has a unique body shape. Take the fashion forecast and make it your own. Put your own unique spin on everything that you wear and remember to just be you! Fall is a great season to try out new colors. Now that we know the models wearing the colors are not perfect, hopefully we will feel a bit more adventurous with fall trends! You are just as beautiful as these models, so embrace your uniqueness, and remember they make you who you are. You are beautiful and unique. Every laugh line that is etched on your face should be treasured, every wrinkle, and every scar should be worn with proud. All those things have made you who you are today, and with that, you should be proud. Eyeshadow, Blush, & Lipstick This season, we are seeing lots of purples and grays on lids.  These eye shadows have a ton of varying shades, so there is definitely one that is guaranteed to look fabulous on you.  Maybe even more than one!  These shades work with all eye colors, so do not be afraid to experiment.  With all the focus on eyes and lips, you can take it easy on the blush. Shoes shoes shoes fabulous shoes Shades of roses and mochas will match these shadows fabulously, and keep you looking fall fresh. For lips, try shades of berries and reds. mascara and lip-glosses.  Used mascara's can be very irritating to the delicate eye area, and lip-glosses can harbor unwanted bacteria.  Lipsticks can be cleaned with a quick swipe of alcohol.  Clean all eye shadows, swiping a tissue with alcohol over the shadow or the cream shadow.  Also be careful.
Finding You in the Midst of Adversity and Pain
By: Diana Paino-Fulton

        Oh Lord, it is me again…Have you heard my cry or seen the tears that I have shed amidst the anguishing situation that is before me? Oh Lord, this is not the first time but it will be the last time I will love, try to help another, fight for what's right, try to reach my goals, or give as I have. I just can't go through the same scenario again.

        Stop and look at the life of Jesus on earth. It was filled with loving, giving, helping, pain, attending to others, no matter the circumstances. Even Jesus asked how long he had to stay amidst the people that were surrounding him. One of his first miracles was due to being obedient to his mother's request. He did not follow the rules and regulations of when a person was to be healed, he told them who he was and he was ridiculed for it. Jesus your son, faced the cross in a very horrible way, still loving us he gave his life to allow us to face you once more after this life.

        Even though Jesus was laughed at, stoned, whipped, dared to save himself and was sold to be crucified for money, He withstood the pain, the anguish, the hurt felt by the people who were believers. No one who he taught stood by his side during his walk to the cross, they all scattered. While his disciple looked on from a distance, not brave enough to testify of his greatness. Yet Jesus loved him and us through all this, and still today continually unconditionally loves us. Jesus never gave in, gave up, let go while reaching his potential.  How could we have forgotten your trials, your faithfulness, your love, your hand holding us and lifting us and assisting us as we walk our own path.

        Oh Lord I see you, in the midst of my adversity and pain. I know that somehow and someway you will help me to get through this. You will restore me to the joy of my salvation. You will help me to heal, to be whole, to give again, to help again, to trust again and to love again, knowing that this is your way and that you are with me always, giving me the strength and courage to continue on in you.

        Rise up this morning in the midst of Jesus and the Glory of our Father in Heaven. Continually seek his face for the strength that you need to get through each day and each moment within your life. God is a faithful and true God. He cares for your every need. He stands over you with an undying love drawing you to his side daily as you allow him. Jesus gives you the grace to get through each situation and circumstance. With God you can live and be the vessel He has called you to be and dwell with joy through any journey you face.

First published May 2012 © Copyright



When Silence Utters Words
By: Diana Paino-Fulton

            As we grow in life, we find that silence utters words. In many situations, we may be silent, still, praying, hoping, and just waiting for the situation at hand to change. This can be just for a moment, days, years or a lifetime. As we pour our heart and soul into the belief that things will change, we continue in silence, waiting...

        The yearning in our hearts is not heard but felt only by us. We continue in silence, in that moment of time. Even as we may look weak to others or ignorant, we know in our heart and soul the Lord has held our tongue, bent our knees and folded our hands. Many times, we go before the Lord sobbing and in pain, with our prayers. Although we are never silent in God's eyes, however, we still remain silent to the world, silent to others involved.

        Silence is not an easy trait to embrace. Now-a-days, not many people are patient and diligent enough to ponder quietly and listen to the spirit for inspiration. Within our rushed life we tend to run to the next task. We don't find the time to observe, wait, be silent and pray about the situations we encounter. Today, many of us tend to embrace a busy world, a busy life, a busy us.

        Eventually, at the right time, the silence is broken and the silence speaks. It speaks loud and clear at times or sometimes gentle, sometimes with authority, but with wisdom which is not of our own. The words at times may come across as harsh, insensitive, or surprising. Hearing the words or feeling the inspirational feelings for the first time may make us react in a state of shock and dismay since we never expected it. We may have thought that we would never get a response from God or a whisper from the spirit. But the silence has broken.

        When we have lived as we desired for so long, once the silence is broken, it may shock us and bring us to realize the truth. This broken silence being spoken by us also shocks and gives truth to the many other individuals involved. But God's words has broken through with truth, authority, wisdom, and his gentle whispers from the Spirit. Once the silence is broken, God's words opens our hearts. What will come of this is a new day and a new way to go forward.

First published April 2012 © Copyright



Parenting by the Golden Rule
By: Deanne Brown

"All you need is Love"…The Beatles

It would be a very different world if every parent transmitted their love for their child with no conditions and no boundaries; love just because, expecting nothing in return. 

A touching story on "All Things Considered" a news program on National Public Radio conveyed this unconditional love brilliantly.  Brad Meltzer, bestselling novelist, and featured guest, shared his own personal experience.  He was faced with a difficult time in his life when his book writing career hit a snag.  He was at a crossroads.  What would he do if he could not write books for a living?  At the time, his mother was dying of cancer.  She told him, "I would love you if you were a garbage man."

This is true unconditional love. Loving in this manner, without conditions, limitations or reservations is the best gift you can give to your children. To love your child unconditionally and to affirm that love gives you the ability to love yourself.  And, as we all know, loving yourself is the very foundation for healthy self-esteem.

The problem is that many parents do not know how to love their children in this manner because they were not loved unconditionally themselves. Conditions, restraints, and unreasonable expectations were put on them, keeping them from living up to their full potential, loving themselves and loving others.

So, how does one love unconditionally?

There are not any simple "how to" books on the subject or quick fix schemes available, but there is one universal truth that spans all religions and philosophies, has no borders, and opens one's life to loving unconditionally. It is the Golden Rule.

The Golden Rule simply states, treat others the way you would like to be treated and everything else will fall into place.  It seems pretty simple, doesn't it? In actuality it is the most commanding and profound idea ever. Buddha, Jesus and Confucius all knew its power.

Buddhism: Hurt not others in ways that you yourself would find hurtful. ~ Udana-Varga 5,1

Christianity: All things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye so to them; for this is the law and
the prophets. ~ Matthew 7:1

Confucianism: Do not do to others what you would not like yourself. Then there will be no resentment against you, either in the family or in the state. ~ Analects 12:2

History would change if everyone lived by this universal idea. Families would change if every parent lived by this idea. If each and every one of us could simply treat our children the way we want to be treated, love would prevail. Unreasonable expectations, conditions, and controls will melt away leaving enormous room for unconditional love. This pure love will give your child the self-esteem he or she needs to go out into the world and become who they are suppose to be.  And, when you follow your inner compass, becoming yourself fully, you find bliss.  As Mahatma Ghandi said, "And where there is love, there is life."

So the next time your child hits a road block in life, simply let them know how much they are loved and you will be a part of not only changing your child's history but changing the history of the world.

First published March 2012 © Copyright



The Wonders of His Love
By: Diana Paino-Fulton

There is a wonderful expression that gives a person the feeling of joy and peace within. An example of this is when a woman is swept off her feet by the man she meets, or the person that has charmed you with a very sweet jester or word. It can send us on a cloud with a mystical type feeling of life being a paradise or just so wonderful with God's love.

But aside from all this escaping into the wonderful world of joy, we all have times where things just are not going our way. As to why, we can always speculate. No matter the reason, many times in our lives we can be given a whirlwind of bad news, situations, setbacks and pain. So what do we do with this whirlwind? How do we address it and live through it as calm, loving, and centered woman? How can we smile with joy from within to the world that is spinning around us at speeds we cannot even comprehend? How do we rest knowing that everything will be fine on the other side of the whirlwind? How do we stand still and know that God is God and will get us through this most tragic time in our lives?

This is where our faith is tested. We feel what life truly is, with trials and obstacles, where we are pressed on every side yet not giving in. We may feel like giving up. No one is ever overjoyed and happy that they are in this whirlwind of obstacles. But we are kept within it somehow with a steadiness only God can give us. Only His grace and love…can help us get through all the pain.
 
This is where we see the 'wonders of his love'. This is where God exceeds our expectations from the most trivial need to the most desperate need within our lives. It is in this time that we must hold on and continue even though the whirlwind may cause us to waver in our faith. Though we struggle we know that God is the only one that can get us through this time. He is the only one that can change the situations for us and calm us in the midst of the storm.

So when we speak of true love and true care, there is only one that can be there and will be there all the time for us. We may have a wonderful spouse, wonderful family and many friends, yet it is in the bad whirlwind of life that the wonderful love of God fills us with the hope, joy, and we fill our lives with faith. Knowing that somehow and someway God will turn our whirlwind into a miracle of his glory.

Published February 2012 © Copyright



Our Past - Our Present - Our Future
By: Diana Paino-Fulton

An ever changing life, and ever changing season, surmounted with situations and trials that only we can feel within. We thrive to go forward into our future but how many times does our past and present continue to stop us from going forward? As we face new beginnings, with new resolutions, new opportunities, and as the entire world embraces a fresh new year, we connect our past and our present to our future.

In the midst of all of these changes and seasons we stand in the present with feelings flooding in from the past as we try to go forward to a better future. How do we get to a better future? How can we recognize that we are holding on to the past? How can we know we are stuck in the present? Even as we stop looking around us and look within us, what do we find? How have we acted towards those within our presence? What have we stood up for regardless of those we may hurt? What have we done or received within our lifetime with joy and appreciation? Who have we helped unselfishly?

The list of important questions and self-examination can go on with a whirlwind of wonder, reflection, truth, sadness and joy. Pondering these questions we must remember that we are not perfect, and we cannot be everything to everybody. We must strive to be like Jesus, our example. As we look at Jesus, his personality and his life on earth, he shows us the way to live. Seeing the wrongs we make, we must apologize and change our ways. As we seek God's will and truly reflect on the words of Jesus, we are changed and renewed daily. We go forward as the children God intended us to be.

To be the person God has intended us to be, we must embrace stamina beyond our control or making. We should love in times of hate, laugh in times of sadness, and we should speak life in times of destruction. We fill our days and conversations with good thoughts and deeds, giving as opposed to receiving, with amazing peace knowing we are doing the will of God.

Our life is ever changing and our seasons ever passing with situations and trials continually before us each year. May we find a renewed hope and peace as we live for the future in the midst of the present day and may we be fully comfortable with the ending of our past to go on, desiring to see the changes within our lives for this year, this month, this day and this moment, with the blessings that others have received through our selflessness. In making resolutions, we must ask ourselves if we only make resolutions for ourselves or were we thinking of others as we made our resolutions? Were we an example of Jesus or of our selfish world?

We need God to help us settle our past and place it as far as the east is to the west. We need God to help us embrace the lessons our past has taught us and let go of the pain it brings us, with a present time of continued renewal moment to moment, not allowing the wrongs of our past to stay and become our past once again or our future regrets. We need God to help us embrace the bright hopeful future that he has already set before us. As we follow him with faith, we will know that we have done his will without continual regrets of our actions, decisions or moments of fear and frustration that tries to take a hold of us.

Peace, Love, Joy and Blessings to you this wonderful fresh and New Year

Published January 2012 © Copyright



If There Was One Chance Would You Take It?
By: Diana Paino-Fulton

With the start of a new month and a lot going on in December, you get caught up in the hustle and bustle. With presents to buy, gifts to wrap, and cards to send to love ones, how do you find that time to slow down and enjoy the season of love? With a vast amount of parties to attend, office and family commitments, where do you find the avenue to rest?

It is during this season of joy that you must stop and reflect on your world. What truly is important to us and our lives. You must slow down the high speed ahead and find some time to slow down, take full appreciation of the gift of Christmas and get the relaxation we need to continue in the joy of the Lord.

Even if you are unable to do all your Christmas shopping or have all the family and work gatherings, you will still be whisked into the whirlwind of the season no matter where you go. Thinking you have missed out on the joy of buying or giving. But you have not.

The Christmas present you give to others and to yourself is a joy that you can reflect on throughout your life, everyday, each new day. In the midst of the rush of the world, stop, breathe deep and smile. Look at others in the light of Christ, do a positive deed, share a positive comment, reflect a caring attitude. Extend a compliment or encouragement to those you come across that look as if they cannot go on another step.

As you extend yourself to others and allow the love and joy of the Lord to be spread across the avenues of love you walk, you will really see the season, the true meaning of the time you are trying to celebrate this month. Your proactive joyful steps you make will boomerang back to you and fill your day, your life, your world with the joy of Christmas.

So remember as you go along in your merry way that you have today to share and care. You have today to give and be a blessing to many that you pass along the way. You have today to extend your hand to the many that may not seem deserving of it from the world's perspective, but are in deep need of it. This is where you will find the true meaning of the season and the true meaning of our Lord.

If you had one chance to make a difference in someone's life, one chance to truly seize the season or moment, one chance to be the angel you were meant to be, one chance to bless another and spread the message of Christmas,  would you take it and run with it, having a heart full of joy in the situation? That chance is available to you each day and each minute you are here on earth. Take it. May you run with it and fulfill your purpose for the day, fulfill your purpose for the year, fulfill your full potential.

Have a very Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah and Happy Holidays to all… Spread the joy throughout your corner and be the light unto the world this day to someone who really needs that minute of your time or the special embrace that only you can give.

Published December 2011 © Copyright



Embracing Gratitude
By: Jeanine DeHoney

Many have had to hang on to peace in the midst of chaos and God granted it to them.

Many have had to embrace change when they wanted to stay in familiar terrain and God granted them courage to move to another realm.

Many have ached because of loss, heartbreak, or a dream that seemed to be unattainable, and God granted them wisdom, a forgiving heart, and a new vision or goal and put people in place to help it come to fruition.

And because of feeling God's presence, comfort and peace, they have learned, with arms wide open to embrace an attitude of gratitude. But having an innate aura of gratitude in your spirit can be difficult when you are disheartened. During those low tides in your life, gratitude is usually the last thing on your mind. Instead of being thankful for what you have in life, what is sustaining you emotionally, spiritually, physically and financially, you wallow in depressing and counterproductive thoughts of what is wrong or lacking in your life.

It is then though, that we need to sing a praise song. It is then we need to shout to adversary that you refuse to let it steal your joy. Thank God for something small and watch his miracle wonder working power cause a chain reaction of thankfulness in you. So, if you are finding that you are courting negativity and angst instead of gratitude, here are some suggestions that will hopefully change your way of thinking and help you live your life more abundantly.

Pray.
Begin and end your day with thanks. Give thanks to all the ways God has manifested small and big miracles, favor, and care throughout the day and evening. Pray throughout the day. Make it a habit.

Start from the basics.
Start from the basics, if you are hard-pressed to find things to be grateful for. You can start with, "I'm thankful for eyes that see and ears that hear…" It may sound juvenile but begin there. Be grateful for every part of your temple from your head to your toes. Be grateful for a boyfriend or husband that treats you like a queen, or a parent that still spoils you even though you're grown, or a sister-friend you can call at two in the morning just because you have something on your mind and she won't hang up on you. 

Create a treasure chest.
Get a beautiful keepsake box and fill it with objects that evoke wonderful memories. Things like pictures, greeting cards, a knick-knack from a favorite family member, something from your childhood, etc. During troubling times open up your treasure chest so that you can have literal reminders of all of your blessings and relive cherished memories.

Take a walk in someone else's shoes.
Imagine what it would feel like to walk in someone else's shoes for a day who was less fortunate than you are. Imagine being homeless, being unemployed, a struggling single mother, and abused wife or girlfriend. Be grateful that you have not had to carry many of the burdens other people have. Then go out and serve! Serve at a local women shelter or find other ways to make a difference in someone whose shoes by the grace of God you have not had to walk in.

Encircle yourself with splendor.
There is splendor all around us that is inspiring and instrumental in cultivating a spirit of gratitude. Grab a friend, throw on your sneakers and take a walk through the park to sojourn with nature. Go to an art museum or an art show of an up and coming artist or designer. Buy tickets to a concert and go see your favorite artist or buy a new CD. Try going to a much talked about restaurant and pay attention to everything from the ambiance to the way your food is plated. Savor each bite and give thanks that someone prepared your food with love and the end result of seeing your palate satisfied.

Create a ripple effect.
Gratitude begets more gratitude; it has a ripple effect and reverberates not only in your soul but the soul of others.

Today choose to release your reservoir of discontent by embracing gratitude. Know that through prayer no vision is ever unreachable or problem ever insurmountable. Just open up your beautiful "eyes to see," and you will be a witness to all of your blessings.

Published November 2011 © Copyright



When Life Throws A Snowball At You, Throw It Back Harder!
By: Deanne Brown

Life can be crazy and unpredictable at times. It can throw snowballs at you in the middle of the summer. It can knock the wind out of you, when you least expect it. It can leave you breathless and stunned. For some women that snowball is breast cancer. Over 200,000 smart beautiful women are diagnosed with invasive breast cancer in the United States every year. 40,000 of these women will die from this dreaded disease. 

Chances are you already know someone who has breast cancer; your mother, a sister, an aunt, a girlfriend or a friend of a girlfriend. No one is exempt. That includes you. This is not intended to scare you. This is just a friendly reminder of how fragile and precious life is. So consider this a wake-up call, a reality check, or a word to the wise. 

Breast cancer has become quite notorious. Unfortunately, the incidents of breast cancer have been increasing year by year. Fortunately, the death rate is showing some signs of decline, probably due to early detection and better treatment. So, empower yourself and get those gorgeous tata's to the doctor for your yearly mammograms. And, don't forget your self-exams! They can be life saving.

Although we still don't know everything about cancer and why it grows in the first place, there is mounting evidence that cancer cells multiply when the immune system, your body's natural defense is on the fritz.  But, the really amazing thing about our bodies is that you have the power to boost your immune system and reduce your risk of breast cancer, by implementing these ten tips:

Take your mom's advice and eat your veggies.
It is pretty clear, we are what we eat.  But, just as important, we are what we don't eat. According to Joe Cross in his film, "Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead," Americans are not eating their vegetables. In fact, for many, veggies only make up 5% of their overall diet. This is a crime. Our bodies cannot live on carbs alone which makes up the majority of the American diet. You need some green stuff. Veggies are packed with phytonutrients. According to the voice of sustainable wellness, Frank Lipman, "phytonutrients help our cells communicate better with each other, some help prevent mutations at a cellular level, some are anti-inflammatory, others are potent antioxidants and many have functions we are only beginning to understand. What we do know is they help prevent cancer, heart disease and most chronic diseases in general, are anti-aging, boost the immune system and generally promote health." An important tip:  cooking kills enzymes and certain vitamins found in veggies, so make sure that you include raw veggies in your diet every day. A salad a day keeps the doctor away.

Ditch the sugar.
Sugar is to cancer as oxygen is to fire. In other words, cancer loves sugar like Bugs Bunny loves carrots. Americans eat on a per capita basis 156 pounds of sugar per year. This is equivalent to 31 five-pound bags. That's a whole lot of sugar. Honestly, you are sweet enough without it.

Limit your alcohol.
According to the Harvard Nurses' Health study, drinking more than one alcoholic cocktail per day can increase breast cancer risk by 20 to 25 percent. Imbibing in an alcoholic drink can certainly relax you after a long day or help you to break loose a bit at a social gathering but like sugar, cancer loves it as much as you do. There are other ways to relax and have fun. You may need to get a bit creative but the results are worth it.

Reduce your caffeine intake.
The jury is still out on this but some studies indicate that caffeine plays a role in breast cancer. One thing known for sure is that caffeine increases levels of cortisol and stress hormones in your body.  Maybe you can consider herbal teas instead. Slurp!

Shake your booty.
Get active, go for a walk, ride a bike, go dancing, join a gym or swim in the deep blue sea.  Whatever your choice of activity, get off that couch, log out of Facebook and dance your heart out for thirty minutes a day.   

Take your vitamins.
Many of our foods today are depleted of their natural nutrients due to poor soil conditions, toxicity, pesticides, early picking, and many other modern agricultural practices.  To make up for this, it is a good idea to take supplements.  For example, most Americans do not get enough Vitamin D in their diet and low amounts of vitamin D are linked to some of the most aggressive breast cancers.  A glass of milk, fortified orange juice or a day in the sun will not give you the needed amounts.  This is one of the few times when popping a pill is good for you.

If you can't pronounce it, don't eat it.
Stay away from processed foods, chemicals, food dyes, and foods treated with pesticides. Limit your exposure to non-organic foods and residual hormones found in dairy and meat. In fact, limit dairy and meat altogether and get your proteins from nuts, seeds, whole grains, legumes and wild caught fish. An added bonus, your gut will love you.       

Maintain a healthy body weight.
Estrogen is stored in fat tissue. This stored estrogen is known to increase your risk of estrogen-sensitive breast cancers. Maintaining a healthy weight also helps you to feel good, look good, squeeze into your favorite jeans and run fast to avoid those snowballs.

Get your zzzzzzzzzz's.
Your body does most of its healing while you are sleeping.  Treat yourself like a princess. Slip into some comfy pj's, fluff your pillow, splurge on some silky sheets and drift off into wonderland for at least 8 hours every night. 

Don't worry, be happy.
There is an incredible mind body connection that we are just beginning to understand. Our thoughts and feelings can positively or negatively influence our bodies. As Lawrence LeShan, Ph.D. and father of mind-body therapy states, "Feelings affect body chemistry, just as body chemistry affects feelings." You know what it feels like to be stressed out about work, devastated over a break up with that hot guy, or anxious about a test you have to take. Your muscles tighten up, your stomach churns, your head pounds, or a pain in your chest makes you wonder if this is the big one. This is stress and it can wear down your immune system, making you vulnerable to all kinds of diseases. So, throw away those negative thoughts, fill your glass to half full and practice your affirmations, "I am an amazing, beautiful, happy, healthy woman. I am an amazing, beautiful, happy, healthy woman. I am an amazing, beautiful, happy, healthy woman". Got it? Good!

We women are interesting creatures. Many of us know that we should be taking better care of ourselves but it usually takes a snowball hitting us at 80 mph before we take real action. We smoke when we know it causes cancer. We sit on the couch and promise to exercise tomorrow as our muscles shrink and our bones thin. We eat an exorbitant amount of empty carbs, sugars and bad fats as our waist grows and our energy is depleted. We drink too much alcohol even after many studies connect alcohol consumption to breast cancer. We think French fries are a vegetable and Red Bull "gives you wings."  But it is never too late to change.

Remember, knowledge is power. Empower yourself by learning as much as you can about your health, good nutrition, and breast cancer, then take the appropriate action. Eat your veggies, ditch the sugar, take your vitamins, get your zzzzz's, shake your booty and throw away those negative thoughts. Knowledge coupled with action is some powerful stuff. You are worth it girl!

By the way, if you are one of the many gorgeous women out there that has been diagnosed with breast cancer, it is not the end of the world. These ten tips still apply especially to help avoid recurrence. Many women like Melissa Etheridge, Sheryl Crow, Suzanne Sommers, Christina Applegate, Carly Simon, Sandra Day O'Conner, Betty Ford, and Peggy Flemming have beaten this disease and so can you. So when life throws a snowball at you, throw it back…harder!

Deanne Brown is one of the 2.5 million breast cancer survivors in the United States today. Find out more about Deanne by clicking here and follow her journey.

Published October 2011 © Copyright



The Mother/Daughter Wars
By: Jeanine DeHoney

      I remember how ecstatic I was when my daughter was born. My face was mapped with the same prideful expression I had when my two sons were born but it was also tinged with another emotion because now I had a miniature me. Just like my husband had with our sons, I knew there was a special bond I as a mother would have with my daughter. I envisioned us having a sweet as molasses relationship as she grew up and us being best friends but that picture perfect relationship I dreamed of seemed to have evaded our family photo album. There was no doubt that the love we felt for each other as mother and daughter was there, it was just that our will to be right, to get our way, to win each battle, changed the essence of that love, making our war ongoing.  

     There is an ebb and flow in the relationships mothers and daughters have. It is especially difficult from teenhood to adulthood, as our daughters attempt to assert their independence and spread their beautiful wings. Like a mother bird guarding her nest, we become fearful and in the interim clip their wings to hinder their flight. Sometimes as mothers we do this through our opinionated words, our disapproving looks, or silence that is so uncomfortable and unforgiving it becomes the elephant in the room. For me, I always had a comment about my daughter's goals, her friends, her clothes and it caused a divide between us even if she eventually choose to listen to me. Even when my daughter had her beautiful daughter, my third precious grandchild, what should have brought us closer, didn't. My advice though coming from a good place made her feel as if I didn't believe she would be a great mother. Although that was far from the truth, our mother/daughter threads just grew more entangled with frustration, hurt and anger on both sides.

     During quiet contemplation I longed for my daughter and I to end our war. I envied other close mother/daughter relationships and wanted our relationship to spiral into one filled with more unconditional love, appreciation and joy. I was sure my daughter wanted this too. Determined, I set out to change the path of our relationship.  Although today it is not perfect, we are both committed to making it one we are thankful for and one in which we can say we are best friends. Are you are in the midst of your own mother/daughter wars? If you are, rest assured that you both can move into a happier and healthier realm with the following tips. 

Mothers

Don't Be Critical
It's difficult at times especially when you're trying to protect your daughter, but criticism especially if it's done in anger, can cause your daughter to have a closed mind and heart towards any advice you might offer. Choose your words with care and choose when you absolutely should intervene and pray about those times when you can't.

Listen
I admit this also is a difficult one. Not many mothers want to listen to things you might not want to hear or be afraid to hear especially if it pertains to sex, or a lifestyle you don't agree with. Tell your daughter to give you bite size pieces of information that might shock you. Take a break if you must. But listen with an open heart so that you can always have an open line of communication with each other.

Trust Your Daughter's Wisdom
Your daughter might have more wisdom than you give her credit for. If you have taught your daughter and she has been practicing what you have been preaching in her youth, the majority of decisions she makes will most likely be decisions she will think through and apply your teachings. Take a deep breath and know that she will continue to grow and have more wisdom in the future.

If your daughter is still in her teen years, teach her through your example and remind her that she is responsible for her own actions. You are there to guide her and lead her to a brighter future.

Don't Repeat Your Own Mother's Mistakes
Reflect on your own relationship with your mother and the trials you went through. Are they similar to what you are going through with your daughter? How did you feel when your mother said some of the hurtful words to you that you now find saying to your daughter? Make a promise to yourself not to repeat your mother's parenting mistakes.

Daughters
Letter To Mom
Write a letter to your mother. Sometimes a letter will get your point across more than a face to face conversation. You too, need to choose your words carefully. Make sure they are respectful as well as honest. Try to do this without blame.

Mother's Make Mistakes Too
Realize that your mother is not infallible even though she may act as if she is. She may have self-esteem issues or be overprotective due to issues from her own childhood or life experiences. She did the best she could with the emotional and parenting skills she had. But hopefully if she realizes that some of her issues have trickled down to you, she will be open to making changes.

Build Together
Build from a place you both love for a better relationship. If you both love cooking, begin cooking together. If you both like watching movies plan a movie night one weekend. Vow to keep your time together issue free.

Mothers & Daughters

Gratitude List
Start a gratitude list for each other. Write down a list of things the other does to make your life meaningful.

Show Your Love
Be more demonstrative with each other. A hug, cuddle, kiss, squeeze throughout the day is a guaranteed way to bring about more bliss and healing in your relationship.

Acknowledge Each Others' Strengths
As mothers and daughters, we each have strengths as well as flaws. Acknowledging that is a key step to ending our wars. It is possible to take off our battle armor and put on an armor of peace, love, and all of the other wonderful qualities that come with being a mother or a daughter.

Published September 2011 © Copyright



You Can Overcome Shame & Humiliation
From: Following the Spiritual Soul series
By: Paula M. Ezop

Have you ever been ashamed?  Have you ever been humiliated?  Do you remember how you felt?  Do those two words, "shame and humiliation" make you cringe?  There are many circumstances that can make us feel ashamed and humiliated, things like financial difficulties, the loss of a job, eviction, bankruptcy, incarceration, divorce, or being in an abusive relationship.

When shame and humiliation enter our lives we struggle to save face in any way that we can - most of the time there isn't much that we can do but pray that we can regain our strength and pray that we can overcome the shame and humiliation.  Why do we feel ashamed?  We live in a very judgmental society, and most of us are extremely concerned about what people think, which leads to our embarrassment, shame, and humiliation.  We feel - their judgment, their shock, and in some instances their condescending attitudes towards us.

Let's face it, sometimes, "bad things happen to good people."  Sometimes we are not in control of our circumstances.  How then do we overcome our shame and move forward?  You have to begin by changing the way you think. You must realize that there has to be something positive that you can take away from what just happened.  You didn't go through what you did just to suffer in humiliation for the rest of your life. You aren't being punished.  You must look at it as a chance for a new beginning - a fresh start.

Begin to think of yourself as a spiritual being who is on a journey through life. Your journey is filled with many lessons to be learned.  Some lessons are easy and some lessons are life changing and extremely difficult such as a lesson on humiliation and shame. Give yourself some time to come to grips with your new circumstances.  If you've lost a home, a job, or a partner due to divorce give yourself some time to grieve that loss. Be kind to yourself and know that you can learn from this experience. Then, find something positive to focus on from what just happened.  Make a conscious decision to move forward and to learn from your experience. 

Make sure that you are around people who will support you with love, kindness, and compassion.  Cast away any blame and live in the present. Start each day with a positive outlook, and end each day with gratitude and thankfulness. Yes, some lessons are easy and some lessons are life changing and extremely difficult but with a strong and determined spirit you can and will put joy back into your life.

Published August 2011 © Copyright



Standing in the Midst of the Raging Storm
By: Diana Paino-Fulton

How can we stand while in the midst of the raging storm? We hear the weather report, see that the storm is heading our way, devastation has raged its ugly head in many of the areas that it is in now. Yet, we stand waiting to see what this storm will bring to our area. How the storm will affect our daily lives, functioning, future plans or stability that we are standing on now.

We wonder why we must go through this. Why do we have to deal with this possible disaster? What we have done to deserve this trouble headed our way. Then suddenly we remember how we have stood before, how we have been helped through that previous storm. A strange peace, calmness and sereneness comes over us, we feel like somehow we can get through this one. Just somehow we will make it.

Storms may come and storms may go, yet the one who holds that storm, the one who has power, grace, mercy, compassion and love is still with you. God is still holding you up, just as he did in the last storm, still comforting you and carrying you all the way.  Some people may wonder and others may mock your faith or trust, yet we still will be secure in the hope we have come to know in the storm.

As I remember a situation involving a move to a new house, with the other house nine hundred miles away, not sold as within the last moment the person decided they didn't want to buy it but rent it. Yet, here we were paying the mortgage, worrying about freezing pipes in the winter and the care of the home. With so much going on, the uncertainty that we may never be able to sell the home we continued to make two payments, which we could not afford. There I stood, not wanting to move, I felt paralyzed in my situation…yet the small voice of the lord within me raised up telling me that, "For He shall give His angels charge over you, to keep you in all your ways." Psalm 91:11 As I lifted my hands up high in praise to the Almighty One, resting in his care… I was able to go on and yes, he did finalize this storm, and peace did come. But peace came showing the involvement and hand of God that was upon this situation, for we were in a situation that generally would not work out.

Many situations may come, your moment of being terminated from your job, looking for a new job, sickness, or family turmoil, remember God will take care of you somehow and someway. Even as you may be heartbroken, devastated, angry, upset, frustrated, unsure, sad, desperate or scared; as you are walking through life's journey, pray for help, strength, guidance, hope, faith, protection, and comfort. Always remember that this storm shall pass. Be on the other side praising the God who carried you through, knowing that you have been kept this time and will be kept in the next storm.

 Always remembering that the answer you received in prayer may not be exactly what you might have wanted from the Lord, but it will be what you need to stand. Write down Psalms 91 on paper and keep remembering that he will take care of the storm, the situation at hand. Read it and believe it, while remembering the last storm that He got you through. God will come through again. In my own experiences this has been my testimony.

As we stand in the midst of the raging storm, we learn to trust, we learn to allow peace, grace and mercy to flow. We also allow the strength of the Lord to keep us going forward, not looking back and not looking at the storm, knowing He will take care of us no matter what happens during the storm. Be encouraged to be found standing in the midst of the raging storm, in faith and in prayer, believing God has his hand on you in this situation today.

Published May 2011 © Copyright


What is Your Potential?
By: Diana Paino-Fulton

            As we travel in the world, many times wondering where we are and what we are doing, we may find we are not living up to our potential. Or are we? As we grow from childhood to adolescence into adulthood, do we know our potential? What is the potential of all of the people around us, our partners, children, parents, family and friends? Do we have any responsibility in helping them reach their potential, or is it only ourselves we have responsibility for?   Our potential is an important part of what makes us the great people we can be, our potential governs our future, and the dreams we can bring to reality, however it is rarely recognized.

            Looking at some definitions from the Merriam-Webster's Collegiate Dictionary for potential, as an adjective potential means existing in possibility: capable of development into actuality, expressing possibility. As a noun, potential means something that can develop or become actual: promise, any of various functions from which the intensity or the velocity at any point in a field may be readily calculated
The things that are spoken to us, nonverbal cues, actions, and possibly our own mind frame of ourselves all affect our belief of our potential. If we are raised with a parent who continually tells us we will never make it or that we are not good enough, it may hold us back from reaching our potential. Although some parents may think they are helping their children or feel as if they are correcting them when they speak harshly to them, however, they don't know that they are crushing their child's potential.

            Then we look at our own family life that we have come from or the friends we are socializing with. Are they living up to their potential? What source or encouragement and hope are we for them? Are we a positive force in their lives or a negative force? Of course we do not want to be a negative force yet with some of our words we may actually affect their self-esteem and their potential.

            What is our potential? What is the potential of our loved ones? Do we even take the time to believe that there is possibility in each day, that there is possible development that can bring actual potential? Or are we just living day to day, downcast or in the "same old same old" mode or existence with no possibility ahead.

             I have seen many lives full of the physical and mental disabilities stay at a standstill, only because they were looked at as unable to go forward in life and advance to reach a higher potential. Our society tends to look at the disabled with short circuited opinions and beliefs. This transfers to the disabled person who stays in the same state for their whole life, thinking this is all they can do. Yet, I have had the privilege to help a friend of mine to realize his potential. He stopped believing playing video games, watching TV, and having an apartment in an assisted living at the age of 34 was his only destiny. He started to realize he had potential, before this all he knew was what he was told by others. They controlled his money, with no intention of hands on teaching, daily care, money management, and the basics of life.

             The Lord allowed him the exit to a greater potential in his life and he took it. It was a major stretch within him, to allow God to show him a higher potential to reach for. In the days that have followed we have seen minimal to maximal changes in his life. Sudden belief has flowed through allowing him to know there could be more for him. This did not come without struggle and perseverance. This did not come without having to fully trust God. The important thing is that his potential is now much higher than video games, TV, and an assisted living apartment. His potential has grown, and each day brings more learning, believing, and glory to God.

             From this day forth may we see far more than the eye can see. May we value our lives and see that we have potential and see the potential in others. May we realize that nothing is impossible with God. May we dream to fulfill our potential and for others to reach theirs. May we not give up or give in when reaching the potential takes a bit longer than expected.  May we continue believing, giving, loving, and encouraging. Proving tender words and hugs. Not giving up or giving in, until we soar within the scope of our potential and see our loved ones soar to their potential. May we look on with such joy and thanks to God and glory as we continue to strive to reach our potential.

Published April 2011 © Copyright


Conflicting Situations
By: Diana Paino-Fulton

            What has life thrown at you? Where have you come from? How do you continue on? Such are the questions asked many times within our lives, no matter which upbringing, which town you were raised in or what stand you have taken each day in life's arena. Why do we wrestle with the conflicting situations in our lives? Where does the whole puzzle come together? How do we search out the answers? Thank the Lord there is hope to continue on in situations in life, with a smile, true joy, hope and peace in our hearts. Hopefully you have been able to just jump right out of the bed ready for the awesome day ahead. But, if you haven't then it is okay you are going to also make it this day with the joy and hope needed to continue through, even if conflicting situations arise.
            What  do we do with the conflicting situations that arise in our lives? Many times we panic, fall into horror, with no direction to turn but a trauma scene. Then other times we stand up and confront the conflicting situation with a word of strength from within to clarify our stand and what we will and will not accept before it. Then other times we just crawl a way to a place to get away from the conflicting situation and in some sense to hide from it till it disappears. But, it does not disappear; it does not just go away.
            What  is our place in the conflicting situation that we have standing right before us today? Search it out? See where the true root of the problem is? Receive clarity on the situation? Do the things the small voice within is telling you to do? Step back and go to a quiet place or setting to sort out your emotions, feelings, hurt and pain. Release it all to the one you depend on this day. Remember that no person can solve this conflicting situation for you. Only time, understanding, patience, and kindness can intercede for the moment, with each and everyone involved.
            Do you see that glimmer of hope within the dark night, the dark shadow that was cast down on you? Did you muster up the breathe to pray, cry, and laugh through the tears. Yes, many times we will even laugh within the tears of some of the conflicting situations as we see the open door for communication or forgiveness that has just entered your heart once again. This is a gift to be able to stand back and look at the conflicting situation, discerning what truly is going on, and what truly can happen to help each and everyone within the situations moment of revelation.
            We wonder so many times how and why this conflicting situation has happen, and why it has blown up in our face in such away as this. Yet the root of the situation has been there for awhile, sometimes years, and never has been shown or confronted. So this is your moment to soar over it, to make a difference in it, to resolve the issues that are within you, and to love the others within it, with kindness and love that can only come from a heart connected to an unconditional loving higher power. One that does not judge within the midst of the conflicting situation, but loves each one involved whether they know him or not.
            Take your conflicting situation and let the door be wide open, and if the window is also needed to be opened, do that too. But seek the answer to the root of the situation, know that it too shall pass, but don't let it pass without some lesson learned within. Without some unconditional love mustered up, and some defense that says I have made it through and will continue on in the fullness of my higher power, knowing that his unconditional love will withstand me, encourage me, and uplift me.
Then go on giving all you have, the strength and power, the wisdom and knowledge freely to another person in need of that touch. That strength, wisdom, power, and knowledge that has been freely given to you! Give and receive, give and receive, give and receive…
             Enjoy your next moment of truth, your next moment within the conflicting situation that may cross your path sooner than you think, with a whirlwind in the midst of a calm day. But be strong knowing you will get through, you will stand and you will make it, no matter what anyone tells you. Your higher power is there for you. To give you the strength and hope you need for this moment, always.

Published March 2011 © Copyright
Build Yourself  Articles
Finding You in the Midst of Adversity ...

When Silence Utters Words

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The Wonders of His Love

If There Was One Chance Would You ...

Embracing Gratitude

When Life Throws a Snowball at You ...

The Mother/Daughter Wars

You Can Overcome Shame ...

Standing in the Midst of the Raging ...

What is Your Potential?

Conflicting Situations


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